Ok, so maybe it is silly to be so excited about making it to the gym each day..but I AM! especially this morning cause last night was a marathon of two board meeetings, then to the grocery store after, and not home until right at 10..making for a 14 hour day...I did not get to sleep till right at Midnight just from winding down..but the cool thing was, I did not stuff my face last night from fatique..I ate a salad when I got home with michael, had a sugar free ice cream sandwich as a treat and really relaxed. Throughout the evevning, I did what I had planned for and had the tuna I had prepared and did not have the MandM's and chips at one of the board meetings that are always there..I actually ate the CARROTS! novel huh?
Part of all of this is those board meetings...I get to be involved in such amazing work for things I care so passionately about! Coastal Horizons has mental health and substance abuse treatement as well as rape crisis and the youth shelter..heck yeah I want to be healthy and continue being involved in an agency..a non-profit that makes that kind of difference in SO many lives! What was I thinking by treating myself the way I was? Oh well, for today, that was in the past...Last night I was at that table, a board member and active..and I had been at cardio in the morning, had eaten well, and it felt good. Left there and went to Wilmington Interfaith Hospitality Network and heard about the success stories of folks going from Homelessness to sustainability! working with a board that are so grounded in service and committed! What a blessing! My cup..well you know..you get it? right? I left those meetings wanting even more to do this for myself..I left renewed.
Anyway, I digress...I woke up this morning....and yes..it was a little harder to...i was tired..but I did. Got in and did 10 min cardio on MY eliptical (its MINE NOW! LOL!).
Adam got there and we began.....
sneaky fella that he is...he increased the weight on the cross thingy for the exercises for the pulls. He just smiled like gomer pile making the sargeant angry....but I did it! :) Pulling across, down, and up! That is one way to wake up! :) Of course before that..had to get on the half ball for balance and my ankles..have to make sure to stay on one foot and not let my other foot cling to the leg...I am better already at standing without holding on to something and it does not burn as much as quickly.
Then to the MAT! Lord do I LOVE to get on that floor in the middle of that GYM! YEAH! NOT! :) But this time he was really have fun by having my big tail get on all fours and he said "Stick one arm straight out and the opposit leg out at the same time"...I just paused and looked at him for a second to see if he was going to start laughing....he did not laugh...he was serious...so....I buckled down..and did it! then rotated...and did it agin..then he said...now look up...and when I did..he took a picture and said "smile!"....Oh the joy that these trainers must have! he assured me that I will treasure that moment someday....YEAH...someday! :)
Got on my back and did the leg to...well try and touch the opposite hand...touch! But...I did it!...see, I keep saying I did it..cause..well, I did...and it is amazing to me! so grrateful...
We did the squatty thing..the pushy thing..and the pully thing in rotations and reps of 15..and of course with MORE WEIGHT! oww! but did it!
Today we also got to play with LEGOS! YEAH! they are these building blocks that you get to step up on..repeatedly...and thatnks to a liberal arts education..all I could think of was sisyphus..but what was actually happening was me keeping my heart rate up to contiune the work out so that I am still in the zone...In fact..the one lego was not enough..we have to add height with othere legos! Oh FUN! and then I was really in the zone! and oh no....wait...I then got to Raise a leg like I was in the opening number of the Music Man.."Seventy Six Trombones..Etc"...boy though..I don't remember that number working my backside quite so much though! :)
The thing that got me was on the pull down..once again..I was looking in the mirror monitoring how far my arm should go down and I saw my stomach and then my face...I heard in my head..."you know..you are too old..43..its too late for all this. Your are just to fat Bo...this is useless" I said " damn" outloud and Adam asked if I was alright..I told him what I just thought and how this negative crap was in my head and how I was amazed by it..after all these years..after all the gratitude and understadings of blessings to still hear crap like that...He totally understood..The Devil in my brain..those attitudes that keep me down..those old tapes..whatever it is..NOT ANY MORE!....
that converstaion ended me on a positive note with Adam Stretching me and us talking about the Aware program that i will link here..It is more of my homework...Amazing blessings.
Today is work..Rotary (gotta just have the salad at Rotary and not the pasta..kind of funny our rotary meets at Carraba's huh?! HA!) and then Public Health Foundation meeting and Home for a quiet eveing and dinner with Michael...see ya'll tomorrow!