Sunday, January 22, 2012

Day 742: Greater than through love and support

I am setting some goals for myself, one day at a time. I have found that I do work better with some guides to go by and there are some things that i want to incorporate into my week to enhance my overall health and wellness. Last week was kind of rough in some ways.

Don't get me was an amazing week of engagement, activity, output and some other great things..but I have to be honest with myself: I did not cook at home, ate things that were way not healthy for me, portion control was out of control, and stress was the rule of the day. I conned myself into thinking "this is my one night to have this or that..and well, it was a couple of nights like that. While the aggregate effect never led me to a McDonald's and I never cracked open a box of little debbie's...I did not feel good about my choices. It is the not feeling good that I don't like more than anything. I had some very major events this past week that were a part of some very new parts of my work and I wanted very much for them to go well, and I let that get me a little...ok..a lot. Stress and taking care of myself....that is the struggle.

On the pro side, I showed up for training on monday and wednesday and kicked butt both times. I ran on tuesday and thursday and did a great job both times and today I went on the 6 mile survival run and had a great time and really took the time to take the rest of the day off to heal, chill, and just be. So, there were no tragedies here, I just want to keep some things moving forward and not go in a different direction. After all..I know me better than anyone! :) Part of staying healthy and moving forward is to inventory what is going on and seek out ways to stay on track. In the past, when the road diverged, it went backwards...I am forging ahead...this path is to be trod anew.

So...this week: I want to add more water to my day. cook dinner each night and cook breakfast each morning. i want to connect with one additional training help that will enhance my running. and i want to make sure that I am taking time to do something fun for us and me.

I am trying really hard above not to say NO to anything above but to say "yes" to things that add and give me some good things. Does that make since? I am not saying Don't eat out..Don't drink diet coke, Don't  Don't don't. It is never, I have found these last two years...and hell, these last 23 years, about denial, it is about adding...about having more of things that add, create better, different, more, etc. It is not semantics at is is enriching and it is just the way it is...the more water i drink, the better results I am going to get...the more I cook dinner, the less fat, cholesterol, and most importantly flavor I am going ot time with Michael and more money for both of us, when I cook breakfast, I am more satisfied for many of the same reasons as above (my 2 eggs, candadian bacon and fat free cheese! It rocks..with whole wheat toast)...oh...and I am going to have tea..and coffee...and by doing this I won't need diet coke..which by the way is toxic..or at least the aspartame is. and the additonal advise for training on my running is just going to help me enjoy it more...and having fun..well, that is about the stress..and the leveler there!

I gotta write all this out...cause for me it is about thinking it through...tomorrow when I get it up, it is about recommitting to it..and sometimes, I have to recommit to it hourly or minute by minute...but I am recommitting to things that are affirming...not committing to saying "no" to things..or even to myself...but committing to saying yes to this amazing life and good things that can and do make it so much better to live!'s to the rest of the gift of NOW..and if granted the gift of tomorrow...I have some goals..will place them fully in view and in focus, while my will and my life, I have decided, are in the hands of my higher power...and we shall go from there....Very freaking exciting! Thanks be!

Adam Freeman Personal Training  | Juice Plus Whole Food Nutrition!   |Cape Fear Heart Walk! GIVE TODAY! | Crest Fitness | Live Fit Cape Fear! |Custom Fit Meals| Heidi Kaufman Nutritional Services-Dietitian | Bike Cycles Bike Shop at Mayfaire| Boseman's Sporting Goods | New Balance Shoes | Tidal Creek- Healthy Foods! | Pita Delite- Wilmington | Hibachi Bistro on College Road | The Star News | WECT | Wilmington Biz and Wilma | Encore Magazine | New Hanover County Public Health Department | Zoe's Kitchen | Try Sports| VitaCost online NC Company for sports Nutrition | City of Wilmington Parks and Recreation| New Hanover County Parks| Airlie Gardens | The Shell Cross City Trail | Wrightsville Family Practice | Sandra Miles Dentistry | Church of the Servant Episcopal | Active.ComWithout Limits Coaching | Go Time| Cape Fear River Watch| New Hanover County Arboretum| Coastal Land Trust|| Hook, Line and Paddle| Wilmington Road Runners | Cape Fear Cyclists| Jessica Cooper Therapeutic Services

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Day 738: Greater than through love and support

So, we are well on our way into 2012 and I am showing up. I know, it is 2 years and by now it should be just what I do...but I am celebrating "showing up" as much today as I did two years fact, I might actually be doing it more now than I was then because I don't know about the rest of you, but after I have had some success and get used to something and think I know a thing or two, that is particularly when I am ripe to begin repeating past behavior. What is nice about my entire journey, and nothing unusual for this section of it is that it is all about one day at a time and as a, I am celebrating showing up for training and it was wonderful!

In fact, I have not blogged about training and what we are actually doing in a while. I am thrilled with the progress, but what makes it so important to write about it is that I do actually forget sometimes how far i have come. This morning i was doing my chest press on the inline board with 45 pound dumbbells in each hand..and while it is a work was not a struggle! I remember when I began, when Adam gave me the 10 pound weights and had me do the overhead press and I was almost in tears. Not only did it burn, but I was so embarrassed at being so big and feeling so weak. It was so wonderful having someone there to remind me that I was doing a great job and making progress. Well, that reinforcement led to me believing it myself and actually saying "good job" to my own self and now being able to do things I never would have dreamed of! Just taking it a step at at time and moving slowly, but steadily, and doing the! :) what amazing results!

Here is the work out: 15 reps of each: squats with 35 pounds dumbells, then incline chest press with 45 pound dumbells, then the pull down with the triangle with 120 (I think) pounds of weight, then overhead press with 30-35 pound dumbells, then step ups with 25 dumbells, then dips off the edge of one of the benches, then bicep curs with the 50 lbs dumbell bar, then 30 crunches with the 10lb medicine ball, then 30 side to sides with the 10lb medicine ball
then repeat three times!

It is an awesome feeling to get through this and to do it well! When I say I love is not that i am thrilled to be working out, it is that after all that time of not taking care of me and being healthy, I LOVE being able to see and do and feel progress and achieve at this level. That is the love. that is a high. It is work, but it is so worth it. By taking time to take care of me, there is this pay off and I can do more and be about being able to do more of what I feel I am called to do and want to do! That is so awesome!

I don't ever apologize for being excited by this or loving it...but it all started with showing up..standing there with those, they were 8 lb weights...feeling silly...but believing that I could...I could...and damned if I am not...:)

Adam Freeman Personal Training  | Juice Plus Whole Food Nutrition!   |Cape Fear Heart Walk! GIVE TODAY! | Crest Fitness | Live Fit Cape Fear! |Custom Fit Meals| Heidi Kaufman Nutritional Services-Dietitian | Bike Cycles Bike Shop at Mayfaire| Boseman's Sporting Goods | New Balance Shoes | Tidal Creek- Healthy Foods! | Pita Delite- Wilmington | Hibachi Bistro on College Road | The Star News | WECT | Wilmington Biz and Wilma | Encore Magazine | New Hanover County Public Health Department | Zoe's Kitchen | Try Sports| VitaCost online NC Company for sports Nutrition | City of Wilmington Parks and Recreation| New Hanover County Parks| Airlie Gardens | The Shell Cross City Trail | Wrightsville Family Practice | Sandra Miles Dentistry | Church of the Servant Episcopal | Active.ComWithout Limits Coaching | Go Time| Cape Fear River Watch| New Hanover County Arboretum| Coastal Land Trust|| Hook, Line and Paddle| Wilmington Road Runners | Cape Fear Cyclists| Jessica Cooper Therapeutic Services

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Day 735: Greater than through love and support

What a wonderful last few weeks, but today was just...well, lovely.

Adam got invited by a dear friend of his and mine who trains with him to come and speak at his church today.

This individual was the person who had to tell us all at the hospital the night that Windell passed that indeed Windell had left this world. He has been and continues to be one of the most spiritual people I know and leads with a heart bigger than he is.

In his own life, has has taken on being a power of example and taking care of himself being a great steward of the gift of life that he has been bestowed, and because of that, he, like myself, wants to share the good news to everyone...and there we were..sitting in his church this morning. Believe it or not, I just got to sit there and have folks point at me and smile! :) did not have to say anything. It was nice! LOL! Adam, however, got up and spoke. He did so beautifully. He shared a story of a man, early in his career, who had experienced heart issues at the gym, only later to have it revealed that with Adam's guidance, he was made aware of greater issues and had survived and thrived. Adam told that story as the motivation behind why he does what he does, but also as what should motivate each of us to seek out health and wellness for not go down that road where we have to encounter the issues that can stop our lives. He did an awesome job.

Then our friend took the pulpit.  His message was one that was awesome. The text that he used referred to the removal of "palsies" and the bringing of joy" and it was joined with the passage in Luke we hear so often at Christmas when we hear of the angels coming to the Shepard to say that they were "bringing glad tidings that would bring great joy". What was so poignant for me about this this morning was two things: Joy and the delivery of and too the message.

"Joy" as it was described and shared is NOT a state that is passing. It is feeling, a state, a condition that comes into one's life that is sustained by and for greater purposes, but has the overall effect of creating a perspective. A perspective where I am no longer in a state of want..a state of anger...a state where I am more than and cannot feel, hear, and sense the needs of others. Joy is NOT happiness. I loved when he said that you can be happy about a new house, a new car, even a new partner, but the happiness will subside...Joy does not go away. I understood this so intimately and celebrate this, but what was so poignant this morning was relating this sense of "joy" to where I am now. Once I became aware of a power greater than myself, whom I choose to call God, became aware of gratitude, became aware of the blessings, the favor, the love that IS, JOY became what sustains me everyday, in every way. Joy is what IS through whatever heartache and pain I feel, whatever stress I encounter, whatever struggle I have. Joy is always there. It does not pass. I do not seek to be happy, I rather seek to sustain and be connected to this joy. I loved and love this! But becoming aware was only half and that is where my friend this morning really stepped up.

Here is the second part of this that I loved: to whom and who the message was delivered to in the Bibical days and how it is applicable now. The "glad tidings" at the time where delivered to the Shepards: at the time, the lowest form of life known to the world. The summarians, known to be "unclean" despised, and unworthly..beneth the gentiles. This is who the message from God was being spoken too! This was who "gald tidings" was being sent to. This is who Joy was being proffered and told to be expected!

I love this..because here in this text there is this breaking down of prejudice, this breaking down of hate and classicism, and racism....oh many don't get it. But sitting in this service this morning, there was this loud and wonderful voice and cheers around me saying "who are the summarians today? Who do you need to go to and offer glad tidings?" "who do you need serve like your own God did?". "where will you get Joy?" if you cannot serve the least among you..but moreover, everyone that is among you with love just like what you are taught right here! 

I was not expecting this this morning and it was wonderful! It was beautiful! It was about all I believe.
What I know of my life is this: that to have the Joy that is being spoken to, then I have to seek out and be a part of serving "the summarians". I have to break down within myself the notions that divide my from others. I have to want to serve others and be not hateful. The "palsy" of my own prejudices and judgements have to be challenged and I have to give, work and be available to  hear, see, think, and feel for and with others. See he so clearly "got it"..what took me time to understand..that to truly have "joy" to truly feel that connection and that sense of my own higher power i had to give away the gifts, the blessings, the love that I had so freely been given. Does that make sense? It is so amazing. I just LOVE It and his challenge to everyone there to go out and be of service to be "the message" but also DO it!

I can sit here and type all day and "talk" about all sorts of things..but its what I am doing.... was just wonderful. So..I wish you all JOY! JOY! JOY!

Thursday, January 05, 2012

special post: please vote


The very cool part about this is that is creates great opportunity for the things you vote for. This blog in fact was really opened up to more and more folks as a result., paste and do as you wish. You have to fill in at least 25 items for the ballot to be accepted.

Like last year, I am happy to give suggestions to make that happen, not in all categories and in many there are VERY competing folks for the "best"...but certainly, I hope everyone will vote for Adam Freeman for trainer, Crest Fitness for Gym, Pine Valley Market for best Caterer and for best Chef, Smokey, Cameron Art Museum for best museum (and attractions!), my dear friends Big B and Sandra, Frances and WECT, and if you want to include this blog, please do so ...
and if you need some other suggestions, I am happy to make them. I always get in trouble because folks think I voted this way or that..I am merely offering suggestions and then in some cases, I just don't know or don't use the service. Do your thing and support local businesses! I ADORE Encore for doing this! They are a class act! 
Best Seafood: Cape Fear Seafood
Best Italian Food: OC and Carrabas

Best Mexican Food: El Cerro Grande
Best Thai/Vietnamese Restaurant: Big Thai on North Fourth
Best Japanese Restaurant : 
Best Chinese Restaurant: 
Best Indian Food: Tandori Bites
Best French Food: Brasserie
Best Fast Food: there is no such thing! :) 
Best Pizza: Slice of Life!
Best Vegetarian Food: Zoe's Kitchen
Best Soul Food / Country Cooking: Casey's Buffet
Best Barbecue: Casey's 
Best Sub/Sandwich Shop: Atlanta Bread in Mayfaire
Best Fries: 
Best Ribs: 
Best Burger: Pine Valley Market
Best Panini: Press 102
Best Hot Dog: 
Best Burrito: 
Best Oysters: Cape Fear Seafood
Best Steak: Brasserie
Best Appetizers: Cameo 1900
Best Salads: City Club at De Rossett
Best Desserts: Brasserie
Best Waitstaff: City Club
Best Breakfast: Sweet and Savory
Best Atmosphere: Cameo 1900
Best New Restaurant: the Kitchen
Best Chain Restaurant: Carrabas
Best Restaurant (overall): Brasserie
Best Family Restaurant: Carrabas
Best Fine Dining Restaurant: the City Club at de Rossett
Best Diner:
Best Bakery:
Best Lunch: Pine Valley Market
Best Coffee Shop: Port City Java at Barclay Commons
Best Take-Out: Hibachi Bistro on College
Best Chef: Smokey at PVM
Best Wings 
Best Ice Cream 
Best Sushi: bento box
Best Buffet: casey's
Best Outdoor Dining: oceanic
Best Late-Night Eatery 
Best Delicatessan: mccalister's 
Best Mediterranean Food: pita delite
Best Wine/Beer Shop 
Best Gourmet Store 
Best Health Food Store: tidal creek
Best Sports Bar 
Best Neighborhood Bar 
Best Bartender 
Best Bar (overall) 
Best Martini Bar 
Best Wine List 
Best Place to Board a Pet 
Best Chiropractor 
Best Place for Alternative Medicine 
Best Dentist:  Sandra Miles or Coleman Burgess!
Best Veterinarian:
Best Place to Buy a New Car: stephenson
Best Place to Buy a Used Car: cavanaugh
Best Local Book Store: books on old front street
Best Florist: julia's and or eddie's
Best Hair Salon 
Best Tattoo Parlor 
Best Place to Buy Gas 
Best Jeweler Perry's, Reed's or Kingoffs
Best Surf Shop 
Best Women’s Clothing 
Best Men’s Clothing 
Best Kid’s Clothing 
Best Shoe Store 
Best Dry Cleaner Williams Hangers
Best Real Estate Agency Seacoast or Intracoastal

Best Local Garden Store The Plant Place 
Best Vintage Clothing Consignment Bargain Box
Best Home Decor Consignment Ivy Cottage
Best Antique Shop Michael Moore Antiques
Best Mortgage Company Cunnigham
Best Apartment Complex 
Best Car Wash Cruisers
Best Tanning Salon 
Best Gift Shop Protocol
Best Print Shop Copy Cat
Best Hotel Hampton Inn Landfall, Homewood Suites, Hilton Garden Inn
Best Adult Store 

Best Bathrooms 
Best Moving Company 
Best Motorcycle Shop 
Best Laundromat 
Best Catering Service Pine Valley Market
Best Dog Groomer 
Best Personal Trainer Adam Freeman Personal Training
Best Golf Course Municipal
Best Gym Crest
Best Spa 
Best Shopping Plaza: Mayfaire

Best Massage Therapist (please list name and business) 
Best Bowling Alley
Best Arcade/Game Room 
Best Pool Hall 
Best Local Attraction: Cameron Art Musuem 
Best Tour of Wilmington: Bob Jenkins Tours 
Best Live Music Venue: Greenfield Amphitheater 
Best Local Band/Performer: Susan Savia 
Best Local DJ: DJ Battle
Best Dance Club 
Best Place for Karaoke 
Best Place to Buy Musical Instruments 
Best Place to Buy CDs 
Best Art Gallery: Acme
Best Local Artist: too many
Best Museum: Cameron Art Musuem
Best Theatre Production of 2011: Hairspray 
Best Theatre Production Company: thalian 
Best Theatre Venue: thalian 
Best Thespian 
Best Comedy Troupe: timmy sherill
Best Local Newscast: wect 
Best Newscaster: frances weller
Best Local Radio Station: 97.3 
Best Local Radio Personality: Sandra McClammy or Big B
Best Morning Radio Show: Foz in the morning
Best Local Filmmaker:  
Best Local Independent Film 
Best Local Web Site: What's on Wilmington 
Best Local Writer: Celia Rivenbark 
Best Blog:
Best Thing to Happen in Wilmington in 2011: gravely commissioning
Best Nonprofit: too many! 
Best Local Humanitarian! listen to your heart..I did 
Best Environmental Group: Cape Fear River Watch 
Best Volunteer: listen to your heart

Sunday, January 01, 2012

Day 725: Greater than through love and support

Somewhere I am going to have to see where I went wrong on my counting! I just realized that this coming Friday is 2 years since I started this part of my journey which will be day 730..and for some reason the last post was day 685. Not sure how I did that..but oh well...I am caught up now! LOL! I did this last year apparently too, so counting days may not be my long suit....staying in them..well I do pretty well at that! :)

Happy new year! I am so excited to have some resolutions/goals/hopes...things to look forward to.
here is my list from last year and it was neat to be able to go back over the list and see what did and did not do from it:

Yoga at least once a week: hope to have daily practice of some sort integrated by the end of the year.-stops and starts with this,  Karl gave me a great routine to work with, but I just have not integrated it yet.
Read one book a month on some spiritual text or philosophical writing-wrote a lot, need to read more
Walk on the beach/airlie/or other park once a month-this plus running the trail-yes!
Daily devotional morning and evening- did so much better this year
Find an outlet to sing-Did get to perform this year, but did not do this

Take a class-took class, but was not able to finish because of job change
Read at least one fiction novel a month-did not do
Have a game night once a month-did not do
Draw-did not do
Learn more about painting and color combos/paint-did not do enough

Run a 10k (the bridge run in Charleston)-had work conflict with this, but scheduled for this year and while I did not run a 10k race, I did run the 4miler adventure run in Carolina Beach and ran to the beach and got up to a 12 mile run! :) not bad for someone who could not get up flight of stairs two years ago! 
Do team in training with Neesha- Did not do team in training, but had special time with Neesha
Get the final 20 off- kinda of DONE-But still have stomach issue that I am working on-
Learn to kayak- DONE! and then some!
Move from 5k Tuesday and Thursday to 10k-Done and MORE! :)
Break 11 minute mile-DONE 
So, I feel pretty good about how my list from last year played out. But what I noticed was that things that are about my own creativity and reaction and exploration took a back seat. things that are fun. I need to have more FUN this year. So with that in mind, I am making my list with FUN on the list at the top!
So I resolve, hope, plan, and will this year, one day at a time, and with every good intention and desire, if it is the plan to do so, have more FUN! playing games, reading, going to movies, plays, comedy nights, and doing those things that interest me/us..exploring my creative side! 
 here are some other goals:

  • run a 1/2 marathon and train for a marathon
  • consistently run under 10 minute mile pace
  • run without my shirt by the end of summer and not be self conscious about it. 
  • finish my first book with Michael
  • Write more consistently
  • Keep up with my blog
  • make visits to people I care about more regularly
  • return emails and calls within 24hours
  • and be very clear about what I can and cannot do

This list is short and to the point, but it is just a small list for my personal self. the list about my professional goals, my giving goals, and some others are still being worked on. I am so excited about the year to come!