Monday, October 18, 2010

Day 275: Greater than through love and support: Journey with the Cape Fear Heart Walk and Adam Freeman

back at today! Oh yeah! Don't think that being at the heart walk on saturday and making that milestone of 100 pounds is going to slow this one down! LOL!

But, to be honest, hitting milestones actually does inspire, but it requires making sure that I am vigilant.

Yes, there is no lie when I say I am loving this new life. There is no lie when I say I love the way i am eating. But, it has only been 10 months of change in a life that has been lived for 44 years in a certain way.

While I am certain, no... I have faith, that as I live each day, one day at a time, and take care of myself in each day, that I will continue on this path, I also am aware that old behavoirs and "comforts" can sneak their way back in..especially when I reach that point where "success" is so much a part of the day!

Last night, Michael and I went to dinner. Sunday was a great day to relax after such an amazing week...but also a week that was almost out of hand with stress (good and some intense).

In our talk about how the week went, it was pretty astounding how well it all went: the vigil, the parent tea, the oyster roast, the heart walk...all these blessings in one week! But also, there was the cyber bullying, the radio issues, and some negatives as well..and through it, I was able to get my exercise in and for the most part eat well. I did get this sinus mess and had to struggle at least on Thursday with exercise and I did call in sick for the first time with training. But, I was able to make up on Friday and move on.

What I looked back on though, was seeing myself grab for snacks more than usual...literally out of stress and seeking comfort.

I did not have potato chips or sweets, but i had too many of the healthier things I eat now. I am not being too hard on myself..it is a good, honest evaluation. What i don't like about it is that I was not taking better care just to chill and was grabbing "something" to quell me emotionally..see what I mean? All in all it was a remarkable week. I just keep on looking to grow in finding ways to NOT use food in that way. As a very emotional person, we have shared and I know better ways. The "need" to have something to fill, whatever, is still something I am growing with..and it is a part of this journey.

Today, I celebrate the success and not by having a pizza or having doughnuts or not working out or doing something physical or fun..but by doing those things that make me feel this good and that are achieving my goals.

Michael and I did, before i passed out asleep, go to Dockside on Saturday and sit upstairs and look out over the water adn enjoy some flounder and the beauty of the day..just quiet and together. That was such a treat and if felt so good just to relax.

Similarly, we went for a great bike ride on Sunday around campus..and then I went by myself for 15 or so mile at a fast clip. It felt great!

I cannot tell you what it felt like to look at the scale at home..the one that has fought be every step of the way..and see that digital read out tht said I was at 248..exactly 100 pounds this past week. It was amazing!

Today, I got going with a run in the neighborhood. Adam had a golf tournament, so I was on my own. I did 2.5 miles this am in 30 minutes! That was good time and it felt great! Had I known what time I was making I would have gone for the last lap that woudl make it three..but I had to get to work and was not sure what time it was. It was a good work out though. I might run again this evening if I can.
I did discover another great breakfast treat and it is even less calories than the turkey bacon sandwich at starbucks: it is the spinach, feta and eggwhite wrap at starbucks! OMG! it is so good and only 280 calories! I am soooo hooked on this one!

any hoo! It is all good and I am on my way still! I will end today with the vid we did on the trail for the heart walk! We are still on this journey and no telling where it is going to lead! I am so very grateful for the unknown..and knowing where i am right now!
thanks!
Be!

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