Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Day 809: Greater than through love and support

So this is a new way for me to blog using Siri and actually dictating my blog. This could get very interesting to see how Siri interprets what I say and how I say it. but I'm loving living the Star Trek life and being able to talk to my phone as if it was a person and being able to tell it what to do when to do it and how to do it. At least there is one thing in my life that I can order around and feel confident that I'm not exceeding my capacity for my own ego or my own sense of self. 
 
As zealous as I am I really do like working with people and not trying to run things. and the older I get the more I realize that trying to run my own life without help from others and working with others, well it just doesn't work. case in point is this whole greater than through love and support in this whole effort of these last couple years and what's led to this part of my journey. I really discovered that by working with others...with all the support from others...by listening to others and by doing what others at least trying to do what others tell me to do and listening to the really makes a significant difference. 
 
There's a line in another program that I'm familiar with that says that "we have to let go of our old ideas". I have noticed this is one of the hardest things for me during times of change. I want a sense of certainty and I want a sense of knowing that what I'm doing is right. But, there is change. There are new experiences and so of course I am NOT going to know things and of course I don't know everything.  I have to be reminded when I am feeling frightened or off because I don't know something that I am NOT being threatened or that it is ok....that it as an opportunity to grow to experience something new to experience learning and growing...and to ask for help! To seek answers, and to be available to those answers without resistance. 
 
I have a deep desire to keep growing and yet I still can get in my own way at times.  I realize it's an important part of what keeps me mentally spiritually sound but also viable for just being able to live as a whole. I see way too much absolutism around me. Too many people unwilling to change and the results are as that other program says "nill" because they just won't let go and as a result there a lot of anger, a lot of division, a lot of separation and frankly there's just not a lot of growth. 
 
Recently I hit a milestone in my own new journey on my work and I realized you know I'm still such a baby when it comes to what I'm doing and how I'm doing it and I realize that this is another part of my spiritual growth not only my professional road. This is also part of me learning and adapting and changing while I bring a lot to the table they're still so much for me to understand and so much for me to encounter. Instead of being afraid and being resistant to change and understanding because I'm afraid that somebody might not think that I know what I'm doing I have to look at it as an opportunity and I want to look at it as an opportunity because all of this is about being able to explore the blessings of this opportunity and to really look at it in a way that can grow and make something that has been given to me as a gift be really be incredible. 
 
This morning when I woke up I so did not want to go to the gym I just wanted to sleep a little longer. I was tired, but I went. By going this morning and by doing something that I was so dead set against doing, I'm now on the other side of it, and I'm feeling at such peace and I'm feeling at one. I have an opportunity today to do so much more because I took the risk of actually going out and doing what I was not necessarily wanting to do but new was necessary in order for me to be the best I could be today. I'm just really grateful and I hope that I can continue to apply that to every aspect of my life or as that other program says "practice these principles in all my affairs". so very grateful just to be alive today and have these opportunities thanks be for all!
Sent from my iPhone
 
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1 comment:

Marty said...

I was told once that in looking at new matters in our lives (jobs, chapters, relationships), it's not the "learning curve" that is so daunting, it's the "unlearning curve".
Inspirational as always, Bo

5:42 PM

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