Sunday, November 18, 2012

Annual Thanksgiving Tradition: Year 13: 1300 things, events, feelings I am grateful for this year.


Annual thanksgiving tradition: 13th year=1300 things, people, places I am grateful for...
13 Years ago I started a list because a lot of folks I encountered were having a hard time or shared that they did not see a lot they could be grateful for in this area. I had learned about writing gratitude lists to generate for myself the good around me and keep it first in my heart and mind and sent out a “gratitude” list of 100 things I was grateful for in Wilmington that year. It was met with great success!
I decided, and have kept up that each year I would do the list but make it equivalent to the number of years I had been doing it!
This year I am at 1300, and I am so glad to be able to have this exercise.
I have included groups, things, organizations, service, and places. Names are only used in reference to gifts..don't go looking for your name! LOL! :)
I generate a NEW list each year. This is stream of consciousness, just like my blog.
Regardless of what someone might think of this list, regardless of what my circumstances might be, regardless of what events may occur in my life, it is a tradition I will continue, because, I/we am/are blessed and it is worth remembering, offering thanksgiving, and sharing with each other! I hope it will spark a list of your own and feel free to steal mine!

I am grateful for….

1.)   My higher power, whom I know as God.
2.)   For a life with purpose
3.)   For 23 years and counting, one day at a time
4.)   For staying connected with those who knew me and know me for all those years and more!
5.)   Knowing it is not about me.
6.)   For being able to share the blessings
7.)   For seeing others be blessed
8.)   Growth and change
9.)   For seeing others grow
10.)My dear, amazing, patient, kind, partner, friend, consultant, soul mate and champion: my husband
11.)For 16 years of marriage
12.)For my Mother and Stepfather and my family of birth
13.)For Harold being cancer free
14.)For New Hanover regional medical center
15.)For my mother’s continued good days
16.)For mother’s face book and activism
17.)For time with my family this year and a few hugs I have not had in years
18.)For time with my nieces this year where there was such love
19.)For getting to know my brother in law a little better and being able to tell him thank you
20.)For being able to say I love you
21.)For my sister
22.)For accepting that which I cannot change
23.)For witnessing such grace and beauty during tragedy
24.)For realizing more of what I am capable of doing
25.)For the fierce lessons that my mom and stepdad continue to teach and live each day
26.)For the continue gift of learning and growing in my own physical health and strength
27.)Adam Freeman Personal training
28.)For having a brother
29.)For amazing neighbors
30.)For a home that we continue to love
31.)For a home we can open to others
32.)For getting rid of things we don’t need
33.)For sharing out home with our chosen family
34.)For our beloved Circe
35.)For the life of our dearly departed Valpone
36.)Wrightsville Veterinary
37.)The beautiful box with Valpone for us and the paw print
38.)The amazing way they handled the end
39.)Being there with Kiki when she let go of her amazing dog
40.)For a bed to sleep in
41.)For food to eat
42.)For air in the heat
43.)For warmth in the cold
44.)For running water
45.)For hot water
46.)For that first cup of coffee each day
47.)For clothing to wear
48.)For a coat when its cold
49.)For an umbrella when it rains
50.)For soap to clean with
51.)For a car to travel with
52.)A place to cook
53.)A place to store and keep food
54.)Being able to keep bugs away
55.)Living without rodents and other invaders in homes
56.)Having running shoes
57.)Work out clothes
58.)Suits
59.)Casual clothes
60.)Having photos and memories
61.)Having keepsakes and items that invoke good feelings
62.)For being able to remember and share those memories
63.)For being able to check my motives
64.)Learning to let go of things not needed
65.)Learning to let go to let others have when I have too much
66.)Learning to let go to let others have when I just don’t need to keep
67.)Learning to just let go more and more
68.)To know more and more what means something and what does not.
69.)To know what has value and what does not.
70.)To know to speak and when not to
71.)To find a place to make a difference 
72.)For a network of friends and family we can rely on
73.)For a network of friends and family we can be there for
74.)For something to wash those clothes in
75.)For lights in the house
76.)For emergency warnings
77.)For emergency services in the county
78.)For knowing when a storm is coming
79.)For Christmas lights
80.)For Christmas decorations
81.)For all the nativity scenes....more than religion, they are about hope…promise..love…unconditional giving…..I love them in every “language”
82.)For all the crystal clear decorations at Christmas..so beautiful
83.)For the Christmas Clock at Christmas that chimes carols
84.)For the few ornaments from our first Christmas 16 years ago. Handmade and walmart. More precious than any other
85.)Fro Michael’s tree..fiber optics of course
86.)For Belkie…the bear coming out each year.
87.)For the white nativity mother bought me in 1994. Still the most special of all.
88.)For the annunciation wood block that Virginia did and the way she did it
89.)For the Christmas cards received
90.)For the Christmas cards sent
91.)For the house in the neighborhood that each year puts out the inflatables
92.)For the house in the neighborhood that has the most incredibly tacky and wonderful lights
93.)For the lady in the neighborhood who has that impeccably cared for yard.
94.)For the amazing colors in the trees in the neighborhood
95.)For the path of the trail that runs behind the neighborhood to adventure into the woods
96.)For playing on the outdoor adventure equipment
97.)For the dogs who bark at me as I run..they are so cute
98.)For the path along the road that keeps me safer from cars approaching when I run and bike
99.)For the trail as a whole that keeps me safe to run and bike from traffic and gives me a place to do both safer
100.)               For a city with vision that allows for a trail like this
101.)               For the stained glass window in the den and the light coming through
102.)               For the 1000’s of throws Mrs. Freeze gives us and the warmth they provide when we need them
103.)               For the computer desk that is adjustable so I can be anywhere and work and surf
104.)               For now having a home office
105.)               For comfortable places to sit
106.)               For our den..our wonderful, cozy den where we can be a family together
107.)               Art on the walls…
108.)               The changing of the art each season
109.)               The Art of elin Ohara Slavic on the way out of our house with a special message
110.)               The art of Karl Saliter always on my wall
111.)               Watching lives of those I love transform and still learn from 23 years later
112.)               For staying connected and be reconnected
113.)               For not loosing people during elections
114.)               For remembering peace and love and “principles over personalities” to the best of my ability
115.)               For picking battles and learning more about when
116.)               For speaking up and out
117.)               For understanding more…but seeing there is more to understand
118.)               For not losing hope
119.)               For still believing it is all possible
120.)               For knowing that pigs can fly
121.)               For seeing pigs fly everyday
122.)               For seeing love everyday
123.)               For seeing good everyday
124.)               For not shutting out the bad
125.)               For not living just for the good
126.)               For not living just for what I want
127.)               For having some idea of what I am supposed to be doing
128.)               For living more in the moment than ever before
129.)               For knowing to embrace that moment as much as I can
130.)               For seeing possibilities
131.)               For exercising my talents and feeling them
132.)               For having a computer and appliances
133.)               For feeling relatively safe in our home
134.)               For not living in a place that is structurally sound
135.)               For having a small yard and garden
136.)               For my friends
137.)               For the gifts of life through friends
138.)               Circe demanding to drink out of the facet
139.)               Circe sleeping on a pillow between our heads at night
140.)               Coming home and seeing Circe curled up on Michael’s Chest
141.)               Hearing Michael laugh
142.)               Hearing Michael play the recorder
143.)               Hearing Michael play the piano
144.)               Seeing Michael obsessed with a video game
145.)               Seeing Michael happy. Period
146.)               For games to play
147.)               For books to read
148.)               Movies to watch
149.)               Things to do
150.)               Needs that are met
151.)               Wants that are met
152.)               The gifts of trust through friendship
153.)               The covenant of sharing humanness and imperfection
154.)               The gift of loving each other
155.)               The fellowship
156.)               The unconditional love
157.)               The listening
158.)               The being heard
159.)               feeling deeply
160.)               for the life of L.S. Dean Sr.
161.)               for the time at the end
162.)               for the sharing before the transition
163.)               for wake county hospice
164.)               for the nurses at Rex
165.)               for the attending at rex
166.)               for the cancer doctors
167.)               for the heart doctors
168.)               for the diabetic and renal specialists
169.)               for New Hope Presbyterian
170.)               for the women of the church and the meals
171.)               for those who came to visitation
172.)               for the flowers at funerals
173.)               for all the love in loss
174.)               for all the compassion and care in loss
175.)               for the men of RJ Reynolds
176.)               for Mrs. Fish’s fried chicken
177.)               for Williford’s funeral home
178.)               for the tobacco leaf flowers
179.)               for time…time to say what was needed to be said
180.)               for forgiveness
181.)               for being forgiven
182.)               for letting go and letting go
183.)               for acceptance
184.)               for love
185.)               For the life of Dot Lindstrom
186.)               The government center being named for Bruce Shell
187.)               For the life of Ruth Funk
188.)               For the life of Donn Ansell
189.)               For the life of Wendy Block
190.)               For the life of Anne Skiba
191.)               For the life of Julian Baker
192.)               For the Life of Bobby Dean
193.)               For the Bobby Dean Connections Alzheimer’s Fund at Cameron Art Museum
194.)               For the Anne Skiba Honors Scholarship
195.)               For naming the room at the Hannah Block Center after Donn
196.)               The life of Darcie Keefe
197.)               The life of Windell Daniels
198.)               The Daniels Heart Walk
199.)               The American Heart Association
200.)               The Heart Association of the Cape Fear
201.)               The 2012 Heart Walk
202.)               The 2012 Heart Ball
203.)               Heart ball at the convention center
204.)               Heart ball amazing auction
205.)               Dancing at the heart ball
206.)               Amazing meal at the heart ball
207.)               The sponsors for the heart ball
208.)               The photbooth by landrover at the heart ball
209.)               Courtney alliah photography
210.)               Landrover of Wilmington
211.)               Tori/Bell Fashions
212.)               Monkees
213.)               The fishermen’s wife
214.)               Sterling house
215.)               Temptations gourmet
216.)               Cameo 1900
217.)               Kiki’s Heart Fundraiser’s at Zoe’s
218.)               Heart fundraiser’s at Surf’s
219.)               My Birthday heart fundraiser at Ashley’s House!
220.)               The leadership of the Heart Association of the Cape Fear and all she does for all of us!
221.)               The executive leadership team of the American Heart Association of the Cape Fear
222.)               Greater than through love and support on Face book
223.)               Greater than through love and support sponsoring events
224.)               Greater than through love and support continuing this year through all this stuff!
225.)               Honorariums for my Dad to the Heart Association (WHA and Brunswick Chamber!)
226.)               Having the heart walk at UNCW
227.)               The beautiful weather for the heart walk!
228.)               The UNCW cheer squad at the heart walk
229.)               The Wilma Daniels distinguished Lecture Series
230.)               Magic Johnson coming to UNCW
231.)               Magic Johnson and that child telling his story to him
232.)               The humor of magic Johnson
233.)               The uncw dancers at the magic Johnson event
234.)               The sold out crowd for magic johnson
235.)               Daniels Management
236.)               The Daniels Tour Company
237.)               The William hooper apartments for the elderly
238.)               The daniels scholarships at CFCC
239.)               The life and legacy of Gary shell
240.)               The shell cross city trail
241.)               The section of trail around UNCW that I run every week
242.)               Running to the beach and back
243.)               Halliburton Park
244.)               The trail in Halliburton Park
245.)               The MLK center
246.)               Fit for Fun Center
247.)               The lights at maides park
248.)               The Wilmington Holiday Parade
249.)               Judging the holiday parade each year
250.)               The rescued grey hounds in the parade each year
251.)               The llamas in the parade each year
252.)               Seeing Santa at the end
253.)               The rotary Christmas tree lighting
254.)               The rotary wheel rehab project
255.)               The amphitheater rehab
256.)               Greenfield lake trail
257.)               The summer’s rest trail
258.)               Remembering the stories of the secrets of summer’s rest trail from Gary
259.)               The military cutoff interchange being completed
260.)               The eastwood road trail open again
261.)               New sections of the trail opening and continuing and finishing!
262.)               Gary’s picture handing in the conference room at Willard Street
263.)               The Althea Gibson tennis park
264.)               Olsen Park
265.)               The softball complex at Olsen Park
266.)               The miracle field at olsen park
267.)               BRAX Ltd.
268.)               Brax cups
269.)               Brax Miracle League Cups!
270.)               Brax making cups for the Stargell Tournament this year
271.)               The 10th annual willie stargell golf tournament
272.)               Having new volunteers involved in the tournament and seeing them shine and enjoy
273.)               seeing the celebrities celebrate the tournament
274.)               listening to the stories of mudcat grant and all they overcame
275.)               hearing of all the fields that Joe Morgan has built in inner cities
276.)               learning about what impact mr. Stargell made year after year
277.)               VIP limo
278.)               The amazing connections of personal stories with the visit to the dialysis unit
279.)               truly being around “celebrities” each year..humble, grateful, good
280.)               this year hearing a story of focus and staying on a mission from Harvey Glance
281.)               making HUGE impact on kidney disease in the region with the stargell tournament
282.)               the gifts of so many giving in a tournament
283.)               the gifts of new stronger friendships and inspirations
284.)               The Hampton Inn Landfall
285.)               The tree house
286.)               Jeff Gordon Chevrolet
287.)               Printworks on Wrightsville Avenue!!
288.)               The entire staff and management of the Hampton Inn Landfall!
289.)               A boxed event
290.)               Mr. Davis Photography
291.)               Dr. McCabe and staff from the hospital and the dialysis unit
292.)               Landfall Country Club and staff! What an amazing crew!
293.)               Rocky Compagna Construction
294.)               Allan Gregory Construction
295.)               Shipman and associates
296.)               Access of Wilmington
297.)               Being open to an opportunity
298.)               Having others see what I can offer and want to harness it
299.)               Listening to my gut and having that gut be tuned
300.)               Having a community that supports
301.)               Not caring as much about those that don’t! J
302.)               Breakfast at Whole Foods with a man with vision
303.)               Being allowed to be a part of the vision
304.)               The service of those who have forged the way and give so much!
305.)               The expertise I can learn so much from and serve better by
306.)               The vision of serving all with disabilities
307.)               Serving and providing access to wounded warriors
308.)               Having a place in the sun for all and making a difference in health and wellness
309.)               Creating a change regardless of ability
310.)               Longley Supply Company
311.)               Hops Supply Company
312.)               Homer the mascot greeting everyone!
313.)               Disc Golf at Kure Beach
314.)               The Disc Golf Club, Aces for Access Fundraiser
315.)               The Disability Employment Awareness Recognition
316.)               The Mayors Committee on Disabilities becoming a Commission!
317.)               ARC of North Carolina here in the Cape Fear
318.)               Disability resource Center
319.)               Special Olympics of the Cape Fear
320.)               The Polar Plunge for Special Olympics
321.)               The Down Syndrome Society of the Cape Fear
322.)               Surfers Healing
323.)               Pops Challenger Football
324.)               LM Restaurants
325.)               The Life of Karl Davis
326.)               The Karl Davis Leadership Alumni Award
327.)               Leadership Wilmington
328.)               Hands on Wilmington
329.)               The Wilmington Chamber of Commerce
330.)               Pro Stadium movement
331.)               Just for Buyers Real Estate
332.)               The Life of Betty Ann Sanders
333.)               UNCW TV
334.)               Carolina Canines
335.)               The Karma Foundation
336.)               Aunt Kerry’s Pet Shop
337.)               The Parrot Ladders in the Rise up Wilmington Sculpture
338.)               Rise up Wilmington Sculpture of Ladders in front of Cameron
339.)               The Cameron Art Museum
340.)               The 50th Anniversary Gala
341.)               The recreation of the apartment of Claude Howell
342.)               The lecompte window in the Weyerhaeuser reception hall
343.)               The gifts of new friendships in work
344.)               The gifts of mentoring and teaching in work
345.)               CAM Museum Camp
346.)               Kids at CAM
347.)               Critter Crèche
348.)               The understanding of what talents are available.
349.)               The partnerships in business
350.)               WECT
351.)               Fox Wilmington
352.)               Adam Alphin Film Production
353.)               Adam Alphin getting an Emmy this year
354.)               WECT News
355.)               The Anchors of WECT  News
356.)               The weather from WECT!
357.)               Carolina in the morning
358.)               The new WECT Newsroom
359.)               Money in a minute
360.)               Frans Fans
361.)               Pink Pack
362.)               Fran and Colin agreeing to host the Miracle League Luncheon
363.)               Jon and Father’s of Hope Breakfast
364.)               The Domestic Violence Center Father’s of Hope Breakfast
365.)               Speaking this year at the Father’s of Hope Breakfast
366.)               The Father’s of Hope annual ad in the starnews
367.)               The DV fashion Show at the Hilton
368.)               Perry’s Emporium
369.)               Perry’s Giving to so many causes
370.)               Perry’s gift of restoring a piece of jewelry for me personally
371.)               Port City Java
372.)               Port City Java Coffee
373.)               The staff at the Racine PCJ
374.)               The corporate staff
375.)               Wilmington parent magazine
376.)               Kidapalooza
377.)               The hearts at PCJ and support of the heart association
378.)               The giving that PCJ does to so many organizations
379.)               Frank Deals Card
380.)               Celebration of local businesses with Frank Deals
381.)               Coverbind
382.)               Protocol Elements for Fine living
383.)               Fresh Market
384.)               Julia’s Florists
385.)               All the events that Julia’s Florists gives to and supports throughout the year
386.)               New Hanover Regional Medical Center
387.)               Hilton Garden Inn Mayfaire
388.)               Marriot Courtyard Wilmington
389.)               The management of Hilton Garden Inn
390.)               BB&T
391.)               Construction for affordable housing through BB&T
392.)               First Citizens Bank
393.)               All the philanthropy and solid giving of First Citizens
394.)               The training for non profits of First Citizens
395.)               AME Zion Affordable Housing
396.)               Wilmington Area Rehabilitation Ministry
397.)               WARM Gala-Honolulu style!
398.)               Wells Fargo
399.)               North State Bank
400.)               The gifts of North State to WIHN each year
401.)               The mortgage North State gave to WIHN to help homeless
402.)               Crescent State bank
403.)               The leadership of Crescent and all they do for miracles everyday
404.)               Carolina Bay Senior Living
405.)               Liberty Homecare
406.)               Coldwell Banker Seacoast Advantage
407.)               The CARE project
408.)               The CARE Project extravaganza
409.)               A friend to overcome the fear of flying with
410.)               Flying across country for the first time
411.)               The Art and skill of Ned Irvine
412.)               The logos by ned irvine
413.)               The Art of Margie Worthington
414.)               The Art of Donna Moore
415.)               Life Drawing classes and figure drawing
416.)               Dr. Sketchy at the CAM
417.)               The Art of Dumay Gorham
418.)               CAM contemporaries
419.)               The art and gifts of Leslie Pearson
420.)               The art of Sully Dunn! (x10)
421.)               The leadership of CAM contemporaries
422.)               Projeckte
423.)               The writing of Ben Steelman
424.)               Whats on Wilmington
425.)               Wilmington Magazine
426.)               The EDGE of the Carolinas
427.)               Wrightsville Beach Magazine
428.)               Focus on the coast
429.)               Wilmington Biz Newspaper
430.)               The daily e-blasts from Wilmington BIZ
431.)               Wilmington Biz expo
432.)               Wilma Mag
433.)               Wilma Expo
434.)               Port City Daily News
435.)               Davis Media Group
436.)               97.3 with Big B and Sandra MidDay McClammy
437.)               Big B and Sandra at the Heart Walk
438.)               Teen Summit
439.)               The faces of those youth the teen summit
440.)               The interaction and mentoring I get to witness at the teen summit
441.)               The giving of the book bags at the teen summit
442.)               Lives impacted at the teen summit
443.)               True and giving hearts witnessed for youth at the teen summit
444.)               All the events that Carolina Cement sponsors and gives to
445.)               Sandra going out and taking beverages to people who work outside!
446.)               Bach Radio
447.)               THE BONE
448.)               Being on the bone with two of the best in town..who care!
449.)               FOZ in the morning
450.)               The staff of Wilmington Biz etc.
451.)               Star News Media
452.)               Encore Magazine
453.)               The BEST OF in Encore each year
454.)               The BEST OF celebration at Level 5
455.)               Level 5
456.)               City Stage
457.)               Sheila and Craig promoting Philanthropy Day
458.)               Not killing Sheila with my cologne on the radio
459.)               WHQR Gallery
460.)               My WHQR mug
461.)               The amazing voice, life, and soul of WHQR’s Jemilla Erickson
462.)               The Art of MJ Cunningham
463.)               The art and design of Bruce Bowman
464.)               The Art of Elizabeth Singletary
465.)               The Glass Art of Jim Downey
466.)               The Art of Fritzi Huber
467.)               The clay of Aaron Wilcox
468.)               The Landfall Art Show
469.)               The boseman Gallery at UNCW
470.)               The art of Ann Boseman
471.)               The art of Harold Hodges
472.)               The art of Nancy Hodges
473.)               PFLAG of Wilmington
474.)               Frank Harr Foundation
475.)               OutNetwork
476.)               Sherre Toler’s amazing efforts for Marriage Equality in the region
477.)               The Penguin Radio station
478.)               Cape Fear National
479.)               Playing with friends at Cape Fear National
480.)               Not getting eaten by alligators at Cape Fear National
481.)               Municipal Golf Course
482.)               The Loop at Wrightsville beach
483.)               Running the loop on Sundays
484.)               Running to the loop and back from my house!
485.)               Looking over the marsh as I run on the loop
486.)               Launching in the middle of the loop with my kayak at high tide
487.)               The Wrightsville beach museum
488.)               The arbor of trees on the end of the run coming around the loop
489.)               Passing people by and saying hello in the loop
490.)               The seabreeze hitting my face as I go over the bridges when running the loop
491.)               Being grateful that I do not hang out at that stinky place with all those people (and some of you know what I mean) when I run the loop! LOL!
492.)               Boseman Field
493.)               Using the boseman field house for our money run during the heart walk
494.)               The art and design of Donnie Wrights
495.)               The design on the water tower still going strong that Donnie did all those years ago
496.)               The art of David Norris
497.)               The cards that david sends us on special occasions with his drawings
498.)               The writing of David Norris
499.)               Harold’s 75th birthday celebration
500.)               The most amazing shrimp Creole ever!
501.)               Mother’s apple cake (and Christmas is coming…)
502.)               Strawberry’s from Lewis farms
503.)               Fresh blueberries from local farms
504.)               The gifts of knowing more of my heritage through David Norris
505.)               The gift of my family’s connection to the battle of forks road through David’s research
506.)               The fire department stopping that fire in Pine Valley this summer
507.)               The Wilmington fire department
508.)               The leadership of the Wilmington fire department
509.)               The Wilmington police department
510.)               The leadership and courage of the Wilmington police department
511.)               Our judges in New Hanover county
512.)               The service of our judges
513.)               Drug Court
514.)               Family Court
515.)               Our District Attorney in New Hanover and Brunswick Counties
516.)               The sea turtles by Jim Downey
517.)               The Art of Liz Hosier
518.)               The Art of Kirah Van Sickle
519.)               The sculpture of Michael Van Hout
520.)               My bird sculpture by Michael Van Hout from the Dreams Gala
521.)               The Art of Ben Billingsley
522.)               The clay guild of southeastern North Carolina
523.)               The clay art of Hiroshi Syoshi
524.)               Waxwings
525.)               The writing of Daniel Nathan Terry
526.)               The writing of Kathy Bundy

527.)               The writing of Celia Rivenbark
528.)               The humor and spiritual insights of Celia Rivenbark
529.)               The UNCW Honors Schweitzer Award
530.)               Dr. J. Richard Corbett receiving the Schweitzer award!
531.)               The cape fear memorial foundation
532.)               Landfall foundation
533.)               The 600 grants the landfall foundation gave
534.)               The Kimberly Eshlemen Foundation
535.)               PPD and all they give to the community
536.)               Corning’s softball team for the heart association
537.)               Corning’s Grants to the community
538.)               Communities in Schools of the lower cape fear
539.)               WRAP
540.)               The writings of Clyde Edgerton
541.)               Acme Art Studio
542.)               The art of Virginia Wright Frierson
543.)               Having a new VWF painting in our home!
544.)               The Art of MJ Cunningham
545.)               The art of Craig Kittner
546.)               The iron pour at the CAM
547.)               Designing a sandblock with Michael  for the iron pour!
548.)               The art of Ben Billingsly’s dad who did the iron pour
549.)               The giant installation of the whirly gig of Vollis Simpson
550.)               The gift of a whirly gig by vollis that means the world to me
551.)               The whirly gigs of Lenz
552.)               The art of Elizabeth Darrow
553.)               The clay art of Daniel Zentmeyer
554.)               The 50th Gala Committee
555.)               The volunteers who gathered to address envelopes
556.)               The stories shared during time addressing envelopes
557.)               The lives of service and love encountered along the way
558.)               Communications from CAM
559.)               Poetry Jam at CAM
560.)               Robert Taylor at CAM
561.)               The museum shop at CAM
562.)               The Senior Men’s Club
563.)               The Cape Fear Garden Club
564.)               The Azalea Festival Garden Tour
565.)               Having the opening at Cyndi and Ronnie’s
566.)               The homemade cookies at the garden party opening
567.)               The Azalea festival Garden Party
568.)               The friend chicken and BBQ a the Garden Party
569.)               The hats at the garden party
570.)               The cadets at the garden party
571.)               Café Johnnie’s at the Cameron
572.)               Pine Valley Market Catering
573.)               Pine valley market Café
574.)               Collection for victims of Hurricane Sandy going out of PVM
575.)               Wigglesworth Hardware
576.)               Alpha Graphics Printing
577.)               Nourish North Carolina
578.)               The packing of the bookbags for food for the weekends that Nourish North Carolina Does
579.)               The children that don’t go hungry because of the Nourish NC
580.)               American Property Experts
581.)               The service of Jason Thompson
582.)               The service of Jonathan Barfield
583.)               The service of Rick Catlin
584.)               The service of Ted Davis
585.)               The service of Billy Saffo
586.)               The service of Laura Padgett
587.)               The service  of Charlie Rivenbark
588.)               The service of Earl Sheridan
589.)               The service of Kevin O’grady
590.)               The service of Susie Hamilton
591.)               The service of all of our county staff
592.)               The service of all our city staff
593.)               The service of the Wilmington Housing Authority
594.)               The Wilmington Housing Authority
595.)               Jervay House
596.)               Youth Build
597.)               Youth Build House and Build
598.)               The board of Commissioners of the WHA
599.)               The Airport Authority of Wilmington
600.)               AIR ILM
601.)               The use of the property at the airport for the business park
602.)               The new veterans center
603.)               The new arrival lounge at the airport
604.)               Choice Neighborhoods
605.)               Taylor Homes
606.)               UNCW/WHA Campus ongoing
607.)               Feast Downeast at Rankin
608.)               Feast Downeast
609.)               Downeast connect
610.)               10% campaign
611.)               the riverfront farmer’s market
612.)               castle hayne flower farms
613.)               Shelton herb farms
614.)               Wilmington tea company
615.)               Watson horse farm
616.)               Epicurean event for the Methodist home for children
617.)               Being a foodie for Epicurean! J
618.)               The Methodist Home for Children
619.)               Brownie Harris Photography
620.)               Women of Hope
621.)               The Women of the Cape Fear Unveilings
622.)               Kenny Barnes Photography
623.)               Race for the Ta ta’s
624.)               Go-Time Race Management
625.)               The inspiration of Go-time owners and management
626.)               Without Limits Coaching
627.)               Completing my first ever ½ marathon through Qunitiles
628.)               Having that registration gifted to me (thank you Andy)
629.)               Running that marathon with my best friend and trainer
630.)               Crossing that finish line and lifting a prayer for a heart attack survivor
631.)               Having him live!
632.)               Wanting to do it again
633.)               Knowing I don’t want to do a marathon! J
634.)               Celebrating an amazing time and not being last..but not caring!
635.)               Running the track at UNCW on my regular run
636.)               Central Rotary of Wilmington
637.)               Andy leading us in Song each week
638.)               Viva la rotary
639.)               Service to nourish north Carolina
640.)               Annual gifts and work with the boys home at waccamaw
641.)               Annual bell ringing with salvation army
642.)               Fellowship each week
643.)               The worst jokes in the world during health and happiness that make me smile days later
644.)               McCalister’s deli’s soups
645.)               Service above self
646.)               Rotary Golf Tournament
647.)               Hopkins and Associates
648.)               McColl and Associates
649.)               Lunch with an Author
650.)               Good Friends luncheon
651.)               Playing Santa at Good friends
652.)               Singing Carols with the other santas at Good friends
653.)               Seeing over 700 women gathered to give at Good friends to make a difference in others’ lives!
654.)               The brown bag lunch at good friends
655.)               Kids Making it
656.)               Kids Making it Hippie ball
657.)               The hand made pens at Kids Making it from the wood of the Battleship
658.)               Transformed lives at Kids Making it
659.)               The breakfast at the beach for Kids Making it
660.)               Costume judging with Jess James at the Hippie Ball
661.)               Brooklyn Art Center
662.)               The new lathe for the kids at kids making it
663.)               Collaborating with Kids making it to make gifts for other non profits
664.)               Building life skills at Kids Making it
665.)               Dreams of Wilmington
666.)               The Dreams Gala
667.)               The amazing totems at Kids Making it constructed by Fritzi Huber
668.)               The DREAMS store at the Dreams Gala
669.)               The Art of  Todd Carnigan at the Dream store
670.)               The Dreams Center at Fanning
671.)               Dreams in Public Housing
672.)               The print making at Dreams 
673.)               The New Erin McNeill Performing Arts Hall at CFA
674.)               Cape Fear Habitat for Humanity
675.)               Neighborhood Revitalization Effort through Cape Fear Habitat
676.)               The Golden Hammer Breakfast
677.)               The new Cape Fear habitat re-store
678.)               Harrelson Center
679.)               Phoenix Ministries
680.)               Coastal Horizon’s Inc
681.)               Rape Crisis Center and Crisis Intervention at Coastal Horizons
682.)               Youth Shelter at Coastal Horizons
683.)               Methadone Treatment at Coastal Horizons
684.)               HIV/AIDS Screening through Coastal
685.)               Substance Abuse and Mental Health treatment at Coastal
686.)               The annual Coastal Horizon’s Luncheon with the Women’s Resource Center at UNCW
687.)               The Vagina Monologues at UNCW
688.)               Rock against Rape for the Rape Crisis Center
689.)               Walk a Mile in her shoes for rape Crisis
690.)               TASC treatment center
691.)               The Coastal Annual Dinner
692.)               The executive leadership members of the Board of directors of Coastal
693.)               Leading into new communities
694.)               The new building for LINC!
695.)               The rebuilding of lives that LINC does everyday
696.)               Vocational rehabilitation
697.)               Those who labor for social services in our area
698.)               Those who help the disabled in our area
699.)               Those who serve the elderly in our area
700.)               The Boys and Girls Club
701.)               The Laura Wilson Servant Leader Award
702.)               The Julia Boseman Student Activism Award at the LGBTQIA Center at UNCW
703.)               The Dean Award for Staff at UNCW for the LGBTQIA Center
704.)               The Hoggard Medal
705.)               The Mercer Roe Society at CFCC
706.)               The Wellership at CFCC
707.)               Wilmington Health Access for Teens
708.)               Expansion of school based health center to Laney High school
709.)               The leadership at WHAT
710.)               The Power of the Purse Fundraiser!
711.)               The continued growth in numbers of youth served
712.)               The garden in the courtyard at WHAT
713.)               The Child Advocacy and Parenting Place
714.)               The Child Advocacy and Parenting Place programs in underserved communities
715.)               The CAPP Gala!
716.)               Hospice of the lower cape fear
717.)               The opening of the Brunswick county facility of hospice
718.)               The last chance for white pants gala for hospice
719.)               The labyrinth at hospice
720.)               Visiting those I love at hospice..in that peace and loving place…such dignity
721.)               The beauty of kayaking in the region
722.)               The view from the masonboro on my kayak
723.)               The open sky on the ocean from my new sit on top kayak
724.)               Launching and battling the waves from the sit on top kayak
725.)               The peace and ease of the kayak on the intracoastal
726.)               Getting so close to the herons and the egrets and even a hawk on my kayak
727.)               Discovering so much nature on my kayak
728.)               The peace of the water
729.)               The privilege of being able to have a kayak
730.)               The miracle of being able to fit into a kayak
731.)               The joy of being able to paddle and enjoy the paddle
732.)               Just looking at the clouds
733.)               Taking pictures of clouds
734.)               Sharing the open sky and what I encounter with others on face book
735.)               Sharing period
736.)               Taking pictures
737.)               Sharing pictures on face book!
738.)               Face book in general
739.)               Reconnecting with elementary school friends on face book
740.)               The art of Joel Berquist
741.)               The smiley face joy of Joel Berquists art
742.)               The posts of Catherine Williams
743.)               The virtual journey through Europe with Elin O Hara Slavick
744.)               The art of elin ohara slavick
745.)               Wect new alerts
746.)               Home health care awards
747.)               Saki saki marketing
748.)               Clove marketing
749.)               Well Care home health
750.)               Pace of New Hanover county
751.)               Elderhaus
752.)               Elderhaus Crabfest
753.)               The senior center for New Hanover county
754.)               Early voting site at the senior center
755.)               Early voting site at the government complex
756.)               Early voting site at the downtown library
757.)               The fish tank at the government complex
758.)               The walking trail in my neighborhood
759.)               Being uncle to dogs in the neighborhood and going on long walks
760.)               Being uncle to Mya and spending time with her
761.)               Being uncle to Louis and spending time with him (even though the has moved)
762.)               The dog park at Empie
763.)               The rescue and foster parents like ashley does from the horrid puppy mills
764.)               Chi chi mcgee
765.)               The life of Brewen Stargell
766.)               The Life of Mobey Hodges
767.)               Southeastern Camera
768.)               Going to Tregembo for the first time
769.)               The amazing giraffe at Tregembo
770.)               The Full Belly Project
771.)               The Full Belly Project Peanut Sheller
772.)               The Full Belly Project Cotton Gin in the hand
773.)               Green Building Alliance
774.)               Cape Fear River Watch
775.)               Wilmington Water tours
776.)               Seeing the Hawks’ Nests on black river tour
777.)               Being out on the river in the tour boat
778.)               The diminishing republic
779.)               The dolphin decorations on harbor island
780.)               Books on Old Front Street
781.)               Chops Deli!!!
782.)               A hamburger made by Smokey at Pine Valley Market
783.)               Smokey getting top chef through Encore
784.)               Seeing others succeed in changing lifestyle and weight issues
785.)               Being able to be supportive of each other
786.)               Discovering new places on my kayak
787.)               The launch at trails end
788.)               The launch under the bridge at Wrightsville beach
789.)               Launching over to figure eight
790.)               That feeling of being connected when out on the water
791.)               Being able to experience the different seasons in the seaside grasses and landscape of the Oceanside
792.)               Seeing oceanlife up close and personal and making that connection
793.)               The Karen Beasley Rehabilitation and Rescue Turtle Hospital in Topsail
794.)               Adopting a turtle
795.)               Being able to release Chase back to the ocean
796.)               Sharing that release with 1000s of others…
797.)               Sharing that joy with Chase
798.)               Knowing all those who care and love at that hospital and give so much to these giant and gorgeous animals.
799.)               Rotary central turtle
800.)               Diligence turtle
801.)               Gravely turtle
802.)               Our current adoptee
803.)               Kiwanis of Topsail and Surf City
804.)               Surf City Welcome Center
805.)               Topsail beach
806.)               Wrightsville beach
807.)               Running on Wrightsville beach
808.)               The sunrise on Wrightsville beach
809.)               Sitting on the pier at the oceanic
810.)               That the Moshaskis family is saving the pier at the Oceanic
811.)               The new sails over the tables at the oceanic
812.)               Carolina Ale House
813.)               Blue Water
814.)               Shrimparoo at Cape Fear Presbyterian
815.)               The Shriners Fish Frey
816.)               Central Rotary BBQ
817.)               Sitting outside at the fist house
818.)               Kayaking by the bridge tender and seeing people out there!
819.)               Kayaking around to Airlie Gardens
820.)               Airlie gardens
821.)               Enchanted Airlie
822.)               The Butterfly House at Airlie
823.)               The airlie oak
824.)               The concerts at Airlie
825.)               The Oyster roast at Airlie
826.)               The spring garden at airlie
827.)               The tulips at airlie
828.)               The moss in the trees
829.)               Hanging on the pier at airlie
830.)               The syrup nativity in the bottle house
831.)               The bottle house
832.)               The bottle house lit up
833.)               The new cleared spaces around the pond to sit and just be
834.)               The azaleas in full bloom
835.)               The chapel
836.)               The camelias at airlie
837.)               The sculpture in the butterfly house
838.)               Port city java coffee while walking when its cold at enchanted airlie
839.)               The model trains at enchanted airlie
840.)               Kure Beach
841.)               The pier at kure beach
842.)               Free parking at kure beach
843.)               Free walk out onto the pier at kure beach
844.)               The annual honors college beach sweep
845.)               The Honors college at UNCW
846.)               UNCW
847.)               LGBTQIA Center being in the larger space
848.)               The office of Diversity and inclusion
849.)               The first fundraiser for the LGBTQIA Center at the Wise house
850.)               The Chancellor and Provost coming to the fundraiser!
851.)               The nursing College at UNCW
852.)               McNeill Hall
853.)               Health and Applied Human Science at UNCW
854.)               Sociology at UNCw
855.)               Social Work at UNCW
856.)               The Cameron School of Business
857.)               The interns from the schools who do so much for so many
858.)               QENO
859.)               The huge impact QENO has on the community
860.)               The MPA Program at UNCW
861.)               The math department at UNCW
862.)               The Thad Dankel Memorial Math Scholarship
863.)               The John Myers Art History Scholarship
864.)               The Kate Bruce Honors Scholarship
865.)               The LS Dean Endowed Honors Scholarship
866.)               The Boseman TenHuisen Endowed Scholarship
867.)               The Ada Zola King Dean Annual Honors in Nursing Scholarship
868.)               The Windell Daniels Endowed Scholarship
869.)               The Staff Council Endowed Scholarship
870.)               The EL White Society
871.)               The Advancement Staff at UNCW and all they try and do for so many
872.)               The Foundation board at UNCW
873.)               The Board of Trustees at UNCW
874.)               Cape Fear Community College
875.)               Cape Fear Community College Foundation
876.)               Holiday Helpers
877.)               The first Cape Fear Community College Run
878.)               The Gift of Education Luncheon
879.)               The cfcc ambassadors
880.)               Fort Fisher
881.)               The Fort Fisher Aquarium
882.)               The eel room, when It is quiet
883.)               The art in the garden of the aquarium
884.)               The baby sea turtle at the aquarium
885.)               The big tank at the aquarium
886.)               Bald head island
887.)               The ferry ride to bald head island
888.)               The barrier island conservancy
889.)               Officiating at the The marriage of David Hill and Christie Eakins
890.)               The clouds opening up for the ceremony for the perfect day
891.)               The birth of the first child form a marriage I officiated at : congrats zach and sarah! YEAH!
892.)               Being able to officiate at weddings
893.)               The bird view in the garden at the aquarium
894.)               Wilmington Interfaith Hospitality Network
895.)               The families served from homelessness to being on their own
896.)               The network of faith organizations who use their places of worship to house those in need and see that as the primary focus of service to their fellows
897.)               Willow pond transitional housing
898.)               The annual WIHN Gala
899.)               The Knox Pediatric Clinic
900.)               The lives of Bill and Angelina Knox
901.)               Macedonia Baptist buying the old Wilson’s building for their church
902.)               Testifying at Macedonia on health and wellness with adam
903.)               The preaching of Terry Henry
904.)               TheatreNow opening in Wilmington
905.)               The funny and fun show at TheatreNOW
906.)               The amazing food at TheatreNOW
907.)               Olsen Park Advisory Committee
908.)               The Wilmington Convention Center
909.)               The brightness and openness of the convention center
910.)               The Home Showcase by the Women’s Club
911.)               The Harbor Island garden club
912.)               Cape fear literacy council
913.)               The visiting chefs at the youth shelter
914.)               The visiting chefs teaching cooking and meal preparation at the UNCW WHA Campus
915.)               The Mr. McDuffie Garden at Hillcrest
916.)               The Public Garden’s projects
917.)               The Southeastern Center for Community Change
918.)               Working Films
919.)               The amazing efforts on Marriage Equality by Working Films and Robert West
920.)               Michael Moore Antiques
921.)               Jester’s Café
922.)               Bob Jenkins Tours
923.)               Thalian Hall
924.)               Shows at Thalian Hall and the escape therein
925.)               The Children’s Museum
926.)               The Cape Fear Museum
927.)               The Bellamy
928.)               The wise house
929.)               Residents of old wilmington
930.)               The bottoms association
931.)               Brunswick Forest
932.)               Brunswick Community College
933.)               The Odell Williamson Theater and Auditorium
934.)               Spending epiphany at the horse farm
935.)               The driving range on Oleander
936.)               Having my own golf clubs
937.)               The detailing from Cruisers Car Wash
938.)               Blacks Tire and Auto
939.)               Stevenson Honda
940.)               The amazing gifts of Schaffer BMW to so many in the community!
941.)               Pawn USA and all they do for so many
942.)               Attorney practice of Virginia Hager
943.)               The Attorney Practice of Steve Coggins
944.)               The Attorney Practice of Trip Coyne
945.)               The Attorney Practice of Andy McVey
946.)               Watson school of education
947.)               The Razor Walker Awards
948.)               The Watson Scholars
949.)               The Leutze Scholars
950.)               Depaolo Hall at UNCW
951.)               The Cameron executive network and mentoring
952.)               The upperman African American center
953.)               The Diversity Office
954.)               Centro Hispano
955.)               The women’s Resource Center
956.)               CARE at UNCW
957.)               Downtown Rotary
958.)               Rotary West
959.)               The Balcony on Dock
960.)               St. Thomas Preservation Hall
961.)               The Food bank
962.)               First Fruit Ministries
963.)               Good Sheppard Soup Kitchen
964.)               Serving soup at Empty Bowls
965.)               Empty Bowls and the pottery bowls that go with it
966.)               The amazing turn out for empty bowls
967.)               WILM
968.)               Men Ink.
969.)               Celebrating Birthdays with friends
970.)               John at Pita Delite
971.)               The hellos at Pita Delite
972.)               The remodeling of Creekwood and the amazing new place it is becoming!
973.)               Air conditioners at Houston Moore
974.)               The remodel at Solomon Towers and better conditions overall
975.)               Speaking at New Hanover County Health and Wellness
976.)               New Hanover County Health and Wellness initiative for their employees
977.)               Being able to speak to so many and share the gifts I have been given
978.)               Custom Fti meals
979.)               Custom fit meals operating in Burgaw!
980.)               Bbq and grits from custom fit meals! J
981.)               Meeting shaun t from insanity
982.)               Getting the DVD from Amy McCauley and beginning Pilates
983.)               Having a TRX in our house
984.)               Crest Fitness
985.)               Crest Fitness moving over to the new shopping center
986.)               The amazing new machines at Crest fitness!
987.)               Crest fitness giving back to so many charities in the area
988.)               Adam training out of the crest
989.)               For learning more how to play baseball
990.)               For fulfilling more dreams of sport this year
991.)               For playing golf in two tournaments this year and not sucking completely!
992.)               For having time to play
993.)               For sharing time with friends in the sun
994.)               For the hawk that followed us in the landfall tournament
995.)               For the amazing weather on all the days and just enjoying being outside
996.)               For daddy making sure I learned this game
997.)               For being able to tell my cousin how much I admired him for his game and watching him during baseball when I was kid
998.)               For my cousin getting married and being happy
999.)               The greatest joy of throwing that baseball with my best friend.
1000.)            For getting ready to actually play base or soft ball this coming year
1001.)            For speaking at First Citizens to their employees with the heart association
1002.)            For continuing to tell the story…but keep Windell and Kayliegh as a part of it and shout out Ashley, Kristy (who I miss so much) and Adam with the gifts over and over….
1003.)            The Cape Fear Clinic
1004.)            Cape Fear Clinic getting more aggressive to treat those who are without insurance and make sure all are treated
1005.)            Intracoastal Realty
1006.)            Terrazzo’s Restaurant
1007.)            The Kitchen
1008.)            Brasserie
1009.)            Whole foods
1010.)            The hot bar at whole foods
1011.)            The giving that whole foods does in the community
1012.)            The brisket at whole foods when I need comfort food!
1013.)            Introducing me to Dr. what’s his name’s frozen foods at whole foods
1014.)            That whole foods using local providers
1015.)            DeLovely Desserts
1016.)            All the gifts of Delovely desserts and the community spirit therein
1017.)            Goodness Gracies Cookies and Toffee bars
1018.)            Goodness Gracies packages and gifts!
1019.)            Coastal Cupcakes
1020.)            Cuban sandwich at The surf house
1021.)            Zoe’s kitchen
1022.)            Fish bites! OMG! So grateful for fish bites!
1023.)            Worrell and his pizza places! Slice of Life is off the hook!
1024.)            chicken bryan at carrabas
1025.)            the owners of carrabas
1026.)            Costco
1027.)            The amazing marketers of Costco and generous managers!
1028.)            The food at Costco!
1029.)            Healthy options at Costco
1030.)            Tidal creek coop
1031.)            Having a coop in Wilmington
1032.)            The holistic alternatives that I get from Tidal Creek
1033.)            Wilmington Yoga Center
1034.)            Wilmington Yoga Center Offering Hot Yoga
1035.)            Going to Learning Express with Michael
1036.)            Shopping at Target
1037.)            Shopping at the Bargain Box
1038.)            Giving to the Bargain Box
1039.)            All the vouchers that Bargain Box gives to the community
1040.)            All the proceeds the Bargain Box gives out to so many agencies
1041.)            My favorite jacket I got from the bargain box!
1042.)            Vintage Values
1043.)            Ivy Cottage
1044.)            Ivy Cottage selling so much for us!
1045.)            Just going through and looking at the Ivy Cottage
1046.)            Oriental Carpet and all the Nasseri’s do!
1047.)            Tazy’s grill
1048.)            Copy Cat
1049.)            Cape Fear Formal Wear
1050.)            Having a little special something to make me feel special from Cape Fear Formal Wear
1051.)            Taking a trip to durham with Michael to the apple store!
1052.)            Seeing the glee on his face when I say “yes” to going to the apple store! J
1053.)            Being so close to the mountains
1054.)            My new experience with visiting Winston Salem this year
1055.)            The post about what Thomas has to say from Heather
1056.)            Bangz hair salon
1057.)            The gifts of truly good hearts through Bangz
1058.)            Watching baseball games this year
1059.)            Going down to the Hal Ripken Experience
1060.)            The new sports club here in Wilmington
1061.)            UNCW Baseball
1062.)            Senior softball in New Hanover County
1063.)            Sharks baseball
1064.)            Watching Sharks baseball
1065.)            A hotdog at a Sharks game!
1066.)            The Sharks mascot
1067.)            The Hearty Mascot
1068.)            Breakfast at Nick’s café
1069.)            Breakfast at Sweet and Savory
1070.)            Breakfast at the surf house
1071.)            Breakfast..yep..love some breakfast
1072.)            That I-hop has healthy options for breakfast!
1073.)            Going to movies at Mayfaire
1074.)            Mayfaire
1075.)            The City Club at DeRossett
1076.)            The amazing wait staff at the city club
1077.)            The chef at the city club
1078.)            The porch at the city club
1079.)            The garden at the city club
1080.)            The parlor
1081.)            All the soups!
1082.)            The riverwalk
1083.)            The river
1084.)            The sunset over the rive
1085.)            The battleship
1086.)            The diligence docked on the river
1087.)            Walking on the riverwalk
1088.)            Driving through downtown
1089.)            Carolina Farmin
1090.)            Having a grocery store near downtown and closer to people who need it
1091.)            The data collections on food deserts by UNCW sociology students
1092.)            The UNCW sociology students presentation to city council
1093.)            Our understanding of the needs of those in need in our community
1094.)            Meals on wheels of New hanover county
1095.)            Robotic surgery at New hanover regional
1096.)            The amazing hospital volunteers
1097.)            The reception area and treatment at the NHRMC surgical center
1098.)            The rooms at NHRMC
1099.)            The nutritional practice of Heidi Kaufman
1100.)            The wellness practice of Joe Kortetz
1101.)            The wellness practice of Dr. Rich Olge
1102.)            The wellness practice of Dr. Carrie Clements
1103.)            Sandra Miles DDS
1104.)            The amazing staff at Sandra Miles Denistry
1105.)            Being able to have my teeth worked on without being knocked out
1106.)            Wilmington Plastic Surgery
1107.)            The gift of the use of Dr. White’s Boat for charity
1108.)            Murchison and Taylor
1109.)            Earney CPA
1110.)            The fresh veggies at Carolina Farmin
1111.)            Home depot giving
1112.)            Gold’s Gym on Racine
1113.)            The smoothies at Gold’s Gym
1114.)            Welcome Home Angel
1115.)            The home tour for Welcome Home Angel
1116.)            Wrightsville Beach Agent
1117.)            Intracoastal New Homes
1118.)            Autumn Hall
1119.)            Herrington Homes
1120.)            Mckinley Dull Construction
1121.)            Monteith Construction
1122.)            Creative Properties
1123.)            The artistry of Scott Sellers
1124.)            The Artistry of Patt Flores
1125.)            The Artistry of Chris Sholar
1126.)            The tea house at the arboretum
1127.)            The arboretum
1128.)            The ability garden
1129.)            The ability garden sale
1130.)            The Buddha frog statue at the arboretum
1131.)            Walking in the arboretum
1132.)            Orange dots and meditation
1133.)            Wade park
1134.)            Serving as a volunteer
1135.)            Serving as a board member
1136.)            Wilmington Theater awards
1137.)            Wilmington’s Got Talent
1138.)            Cuculorus Film Festival
1139.)            PCJ Franchise supporting Cuculorus
1140.)            NHC having an arts council
1141.)            The new arts council space on front street
1142.)            The Wilmington Downtown Inc Space on Front street
1143.)            Concerts on Friday by WDI
1144.)            The WDI annual luncheon
1145.)            The joy of watching people I so respect be promoted and get what they want
1146.)            The joy of watching others be recognized and succeed
1147.)            Seeing my “youngin” be a teacher and thriving!
1148.)            Watching the birth of children to very special youth that came through my life
1149.)            Hearing children laugh and discover
1150.)            Staying in touch
1151.)            The joy of being able to give back what I have been given
1152.)            Sunday mornings in Wrightsville beach
1153.)            Hearing others make it a day at a time
1154.)            Continuing to learn from others’ experience, strength and hope
1155.)            Anniversary picnic with the fellowship
1156.)            The Sunday Paper
1157.)            TIVO
1158.)            Netflix
1159.)            Taking a day off and watching a whole day of Miss Marple and Poirot
1160.)            Taking time to go to Brook Green Gardens
1161.)            The flotilla at Wrightsville Beach
1162.)            Drinking hot cider as the boats go by
1163.)            Being on the beach in the winter
1164.)            Having the beach 5 minutes away
1165.)            The YWCA  women of achievement awards and the very deserving winners!
1166.)            The Starnews Lifetime achievement awards
1167.)            The association of professional fundraisers
1168.)            The AFP Philanthropy Day Breakfast
1169.)            Being the co-chair under tracey!
1170.)            Being a part of an amazing group of professionals  I love!  
1171.)            Those nominated for Philanthropy day
1172.)            The speech given by the volunteer of the year
1173.)            The quote from the philanthropists of the year
1174.)            Being able to nominates some folks I love so very much
1175.)            Those selected as the “winners” in the categories
1176.)            All who are philanthropic
1177.)            Queensboro shirt company
1178.)            Charitable gifts and giving
1179.)            AFP membership
1180.)            AFP regular meetings
1181.)            AFP board
1182.)            AFP philanthropy day committee
1183.)            Diana Corbett’s Column in the news paper
1184.)            Deb Church getting best blog of the year and her blog!
1185.)            Being a part of a flocking! J
1186.)            The ministry of Catherine Powell
1187.)            The ministry of Ernie Thompson
1188.)            The ministry of father Bob
1189.)            The Ministry of Rev Bauman
1190.)            The Ministry of Rev. Jenny Wilson
1191.)            The ministry of Robert Laws
1192.)            The ministry of Don Skinner
1193.)            The ministry of Andy Atikinson
1194.)            Andy Atkinson Consulting
1195.)            QENO Financial training
1196.)            QENO ED Roundtable
1197.)            Ministry of John McLaughlin
1198.)            The ministry of Bob Waxman
1199.)            Church of the Servant
1200.)            St. Pauls
1201.)            St. Judes
1202.)            St. Jude’s 25th anniversary dinner
1203.)            Having Reverend Troy Perry in Wilmington
1204.)            Wrightsville Beach Methodists
1205.)            Wilmington Concert Choir
1206.)            The music ministry of Joey Gore
1207.)            The music artistry of Organist Dorothy Papadokas
1208.)            The Greek Festival
1209.)            The amazing iconography in the St. Nicholas Church
1210.)            The stained glass windows in First Presbyterian
1211.)            The outreach of 1st Baptist
1212.)            The Baptist center on Independence
1213.)            The labrynith in church of the servant
1214.)            The lecompte window in church of the servant
1215.)            The lecompte cartoon in church of the servant
1216.)            The stations of the cross in church of the servant
1217.)            The nativity by Andy in church of the servant
1218.)            The hanging of the greens in church o the servant
1219.)            The great easter vigil by church of the servant at Wrightsville beach
1220.)            The church of the servant choir
1221.)            The church of the servant cantor
1222.)            The inclusivity and embrace of God at church of the servant
1223.)            The carolers at Enchanted Airlie
1224.)            Wilmington Symphony Orchestra
1225.)            The Wilmington Symphony Children’s Orchestra
1226.)            The Wilmington Girls Choir
1227.)            The Wilmington Chamber Music Society
1228.)            L Shape Lot
1229.)            The Music of Grenaldo Frazier
1230.)            The Music of the Imitations
1231.)            The Music of Jack Jack 180
1232.)            Dancing at functions with friends!
1233.)            Shagging with those who know and those who don’t!
1234.)            The Carl Newton Band
1235.)            Carl Newton singing to Moma Weller
1236.)            The music ministry of Doug Leitenheimer
1237.)            The music ministry of
1238.)            Unitarian Universalists
1239.)            Unity Christ Church
1240.)            Temple of Isreal
1241.)            B’nae Brith
1242.)            Cape Fear Humanitarians
1243.)            North Brunswick Chamber of Commerce
1244.)            North Brunswick Chamber of Commerce Golf Tournament
1245.)            Nancy Hall Publications
1246.)            Living out loud
1247.)            Kidsville news
1248.)            North Brunswick Chamber of Commerce Diamond Gala
1249.)             Coastal Land Trust
1250.)            the Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving day
1251.)            the beach to the battleship
1252.)            the Historic Wilmington Foundation Hills Run
1253.)            Wilmington Road Runners
1254.)            Bike Cycles
1255.)            Boseman’s Sporting Goods
1256.)            Tri Sports
1257.)            Nutt Street Comedy
1258.)            For the Artistry of Tim Sherrill
1259.)            Love the sound of rain on the skylight
1260.)            Snuggling under blankets during big storms
1261.)            Feeling safe in the house when thunderstorms come
1262.)            Enjoying the amazing winds we get here
1263.)            Being at home and just sitting in comfortable chairs…quiet
1264.)            Seeing what we planted in our back little yard grown and flourish
1265.)            Seeing my magnolia tree tower above….
1266.)            Hearing the fountain
1267.)            Grilling chicken
1268.)            Watching Michael plant his favorite flowers and the joy that brings him
1269.)            Adding yet another piece of yard “art” from my mother in law! J
1270.)            Wrapping up in one of Mrs. Freeze’s annual throws or blankets she gives me
1271.)            Taking a tub bath
1272.)            Creating my Epsom salts with just the right oils
1273.)            The crystals we have collected over the years for the tree.
1274.)            for the inspiration of a young out soldier who no longer has to fear and while he comes to me for advise..inspires me everytime we talk.
1275.)            For my country
1276.)            For my state
1277.)            For the city we live in
1278.)            For knowing I have today
1279.)            For putting one foot in front of the other when I just don’t know what else to do
1280.)            For being in the hallway and not loosing faith
1281.)            For HAVING a job at all, much less being given these opportunities
1282.)            For being so very loved
1283.)            For being able to love
1284.)            For hugs
1285.)            For giving hugs
1286.)            Did I mention hugs…I love hugs!
1287.)            For all the smiles I see
1288.)            For all the smiles I have
1289.)            For laughing
1290.)            For being able to cry
1291.)            For joy over happiness
1292.)            For living
1293.)            For believing “this too shall pass”
1294.)            For being able to feeling a range of emotions and not just a few
1295.)            For being able to share feelings
1296.)            For being better at dealing with anger
1297.)            For walking through grief and feeling grief as it comes
1298.)            For remaining and working on remaining open to new experiences
1299.)            for meeting new people and finding connections
1300.)            This year has been intense to say the least.  I was looking over this list and there are a lot of levels of things I am grateful for, from the essentials to the ethereal. But with my father’s passing, the loss of our 13-year-old boy cat, my step dad’s cancer, two major employment changes, and still keeping up with so many wondrous and amazing things, I am, at the very essence of it all, just grateful to have shown up. I truly mean it when I say I am more blessed than I deserve. But I would not change a single thing this past year. and as for tomorrow….Jeez…just imagine. Thanks be to God for it all!

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Day 986: Greater than through love and support

I have let this get away from me since Daddy's death. But, I have not let my life, health and moving forward get away from me I am happy to say. I just had to redirect my talking in another direction and while "in the hallway" find an outlet that would work for me. You know the "hallway" right? It comes from one of my favorite sayings: "when one door closes, another will open, but it's hell in the hallway!" Well, I have been in the hallway for a while. What is interesting though is that while in there, I was left there for a longer period than usual and I believe now that the reason was to teach me a very cool and wonderful lesson that "hell" is my own creation and my own state. That while in that "hallway" it is my choice how to respond to being in limbo and not sure of a direction. Sounds metaphysical or to ethereal, but its not. What being in indecision was all about was about enjoying what WAS, what was in each moment..not what was coming or what was about to happen or could happen, but about accepting what was and living each moment. And there I was with this awakening in that hallway and realizing, I was in control of that choice...hell or heaven, joy or misery, frustration or acceptance.

By focusing on the blessings of what IS, life was and IS amazing. No matter what was happening (or not happening) I was seeing the clouds, feeling michael's embrace, showing up for my runs, talking to my mom, being with friends, enjoying some of my work, engaging in things that I cared about and remaining so very open to the possibilities without living in them or being so focused on them that I lost my today.

More importantly, by finding some peace and serenity while I was experiencing some indecision and change, well, I did not loose relationships by reacting rather than responding to difficulty, I did not gain to much weight (remember I am a stress eater and food addict and when its rough I run to food..well, I did pretty well during all this), and I did not shut down...just throw up my hands..by the grace of God, I was able to keep moving forward.

I have been so fortunate to have the experience i have had this year. So much learning...and some growth. I am blessed beyond my own full understanding of it all, but I know that it is a gift! That gift is only kept by honoring the blessing and keeping the move forward with those lessons. in tow and celebrating so much of the good!

This week I am completing a job that I only started back last November. Yes, it is a short time in the world of work. But so much have I learned here and I will be forever grateful for it on so many levels for teaching me about myself in so many ways. I am grateful to leave this work on such a positive note, where what WE did hopefully will continue to resonate and reverberate in the community for the museum for years to come...opening it up and the community up for all sorts of possibilities, sustainability and hopefully JOY for what is in this place. nothing could be better. I pray that EVERYONE will continue to celebrate this place and support her as she is worthy..always.

But a calling came, one that has been around me and circling me for almost a decade through my work with Parks and recreation and like most things in my life, it came to me through no coincidence at a time when i least expected it, and while I am excited, I am enlivened by the possibilities. I live everyday with a disability. I have since I was 17. over 20 percent of our county does as well. On Monday, I will be a part of something that ensues access and opportunity for all US and all of those who love us....the Miracle Field. I am going to need each and every person I know and every person that I can reach. This is bigger than any one person. It is something that means the quality of a community, the compassion of a community, the inclusion and understanding of a community and I know we...all of have it.

So, here to peace in the hallway..but going through another door and living another day...one day at a time....
See you on the Miracle Field!

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Day 952: Greater than through love and support

I am about as sick as I have been in a long time. I will go to the doc in the am..but I am glad that I showed up for something saturday...and while I do have a lot of blogging to make up for, I had to stop and share about this experience.

Brandon "Big B" Hickman and Sandra "Midday" McClammy are two of THOSE people. You know...the types who not only understand what it means to be grateful for each and every day, for what they have, and what they can do, but they spend more time than just about any I know giving back to the community they both came up in...and in ways that are profound, meaningful and substantive.

I met Sandra over a decade ago when she was working in public service. You meet her personality and her radiant smile 5 minutes before you meet her..and to be sure the job she had was a good one, but no state job was going to contain this woman. She got her masters and with a part time gig on a local radio station, she blew up as one of the most popular figures in the community. That is way underserving her in the way of a bio, but that is how we met. Brandon and I met when I first became a commissioner and he was THE DJ and his radio celebrity was already well known..but he always..and I mean ALWAYS had his ear to the ground for the youth in the community, for what was happening in the bars, in the neighborhoods and was looking out for, mentoring and being willing to put himself out there...heart, soul, body and all for anyone and everyone that was in need.

The two of these folks coming together...Sandra and Brandon..well that was destined to make an impact that was HUGE!..and what I get the privilege to witness each year..it is that.

So, Saturday was the annual Teen Summit. This is a program that these two came up with that use to serve teens at the end of the year, but has, in the most recent years been a way to start the school year and couple with the African American Heritage Festival.

The phenomenal program focuses on the teens and where they are, what they need, and what serves to embolden and bolster them to succeed and do well as they move back to school. The event is guided by successful teens who have come back from college to be a part of it, setting successful examples and being amazing mentors in their own right,  as well as community leaders and friends who are there not only to speak to the teens, but to listen. And in listening, it is a lesson in hearing what is going on in their world and seeing what hope..what success can so readily happen! It is palpable. But what i love about this summit..is while there is listening...there is an expectation that these students..these youth not only can succeed in whatever they pursue..but that they will..and they are surrounded..literally by a room full of people who will give them everything they need to succeed and will be there for them...but it is up to them from there.

The day is split between small groups, presentations, amazing music and performances and panel discussions that are led by Brandon. Big B knows how to work a microphone and it is awesome to see how engaged these youth are throughout the entire morning. Brandon knows who to go to to ask the questions and solicit responses and get the kids to comfortable in being able to feel free to respond and be a part. Shyness dissipates under his very capable and skilled hosting.

I love watching Sandra in particular, as the book bags are passed out (oh yeah..there are these amazing book bags stuffed with supplies given out to the kids at the end that have been donated...it is very special). She talks to EACH youth who did not register ahead of time, "why do you deserve a book bag". She is asking, as I have learned, to get them to see value in this. To see the connectedness between being prepared and the gift and success and all the connections that are made in those things coming together. With this amazing mentoring, she walks youngin's from 8-16 through how to open up their posture, look her in the eye and look deep down inside themselves and seek the answer to that question...but to be able to vocalize, share their feelings, give themselves and understand how to build on these skills. She helps them see the connections. One young woman this year, who was so resistant to answering, who crossed her arms and looked at the floor had Sandra, firmly saying to her, "i am here..we are here..but you have to come the next step. I was you. I came up on Emory street in turn key. I know exactly what is going on in your head. But I wanted it and I know you do too. So, why do you deserve a book bag". And eventually she was able to drop her arms and say because she wanted to be prepared and to succeed. It was so powerful to watch. But there was nothing..and I mean nothing...but this love and power surrounding every moment. Again..just to witness it....

I mean, one student at a time, but dozens and dozens, get this love..this mentoring in this room. They get their questions answered...but most importantly they get that sense that this whole community comes out FOR THEM and cares deeply...and they have their part and responsibility in it. Not one child is getting something handed to them..they are all a part of this program: active participants and they are earning it..and the adults..the mentors there so very much want to give..want to see them all succeed and are at the ready.

Now you tell me another radio personality like these two that does this? that steps up and out like this? It is so very powerful. And I got to be a witness.

I live a life that is sustained and made stronger everyday by "greater than through love and support"..this is just one more way that I see this lived out in other places..and while I am sick in the bed..I would not have missed it for the world.

Thanks be to God for Sandra, Brandon, and all there..but mostly for those youth...they have a lot in front of them..I am just glad they saw...on that day how much..how very much was around them if they choose to use it....

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Day 923: Greater than through love and support!

I go back to work tomorrow. This blog was started for me to hold me accountable and one of the by products if it is that others may see my journey and something may come from it for them. I had to remember that as I was thinking about this entry. I have not been sleeping real well since I got home. I know this may be normal, but I need to do this for me. I need to write down what is inside and get it down. The last 10 days have just been so intense and while I know in my mind that it will take more time, I feel like I want to do it all right now. Today in fact is the first time I feel like I can breathe. Monday, my first day back home, I ran around doing errands, laundry..staying busy. Yesterday  was a little better, while I have done some of that, I have actually read some lovely cards that came, cried a little, and just..well..slowed down. But I have this need, this need to write down the experience...this amazing gift that has come to me...like everything else, it is a day at a time.

Last week, it seems like a year ago, we were called to Rex...Daddy had been in and out of the emergency room with so much pain all week..but he had been moved to the ICU..ICU number 11. Leanne called and off I went. When I got there he was on oxygen and it was not good. But as we talked, my siser and I, we had been here before, or so it felt. For 10 years, daddy had been so much. We often called him the teflon man...he had lived for years with renal bypasses, open heart surgery, had had diabetes since 1981, and had had lung skin, and esophageal cancer. At points along the way the question came "what is enough".."how much can one man suffer"...but I always got back the answer that there was business that needed addressing and there was something...that was something my daddy and God had to deal with...and for me, for all of us, it was to be there.

So, here we were again, Daddy in the ICU at Rex. But we knew..we knew this time it was different. His kidneys were shutting down, he had congenital heart failure, and the area that had been radiated in his esophagus was showing new growth in the cancer and it was "hot". He was faced with no way out with this, and Leanne and I sat, she on one side of him and me on the other and we held his hands. I will carry that memory for the rest of my life as one of the most precious memories I will ever have. Leanne and I have had our moments, but there in that room, there was such love...and we were there for Daddy. And we both told our daddy that it was ok for him to let go...that we wanted him to be out of pain, and he heard us. All of a sudden, Leanne began, not to read, not even to recite, but to speak scripture...it was the most beautiful thing I have ever heard. She was passionate, sincere, but above all else, she was speaking love..and it was simply beautiful. Daddy held my hand with pressure....and he heard every word. It was amazing..and I will never ever forget hearing ("for those with ears..let them hear")....and from her came such true love. Through her came such peace that night and it set the tone for the days ahead.

It was not meant that Daddy would pass that night. He was going home. That was always his wish...to be in his own house and he HATED not being in his own house. He has more to do. the next day, we did not know what to do and Drs...God love them..they are geared to treat..to heal...they are NOT geared to tell you that there is nothing more...that there is a time to stop. We, however, knew it, but did not know what to do. I had such a long history with Lower Cape Fear Hospice and brought it up and Leanne was ready to talk about it to...but we still did not know what to do or how to have the conversation with the hospital, the care providers. It was maddening. Then came this amazing Paliative Nurse..her name is Camille Lamb and I will be grateful to her the rest of my life. This SOUL..I cannot even qualify her by sex or status as her presence preceeded her the minute she sat down and began to talk to us. She was amazing. Over those harry potter glasses, her eyes radiated comfort and there was just a sense of trust that came from her. She told us that on rounds they had the discussion that Daddy should begin to have paliative care..but now it was time for us to discuss it.

Camille was amazing and walked us through what it meant, how to talk about it and then, she said we needed to talk to Daddy about it..and that she would do it. She asked if we wanted to go with her and I went...and I found myself asking my brother in law to go with me..to be there with me..but more importantly to be with there with Daddy. See, for months...or longer, as I have lived in Wilmington, it was my sister and my brother in law who came to my father's house and crushed my daddy's medicine's and made sure that his feed tube and all that his needs were met. It was my brother in law who did so much for my daddy..and I am so grateful that several months ago, away from all of this, he had called me and I was able to thank him for all that he did. Buddy was also my daddy's son..and for me, to go to that room to talk to Daddy about this with Buddy was terrifying, but less so, because I was going in with someone I knew cared about Daddy so very much.

Camille woke daddy, and made sure he understood what was going on. While the details are not as important, what I witnessed and expereinced in that time, with that woman facilitiating that converstaion was nothing short of actually touching compassion and being wrapped in unconditional concern and care. She made sure that Daddy was fully aware and we were all involved and able to share how deeply we loved him. Daddy had already prepared for this with a do not resistate and other decisions about his care, now it was time to stop treatments and just make him as comfortable as possible, remove pain as an obstacle, get him home and spend our time together.  We gathered together and cried, but we also shared how very deeply we loved each other and we made our commitments to seeing this through. Camille got Wake County Hospice to come meet with us and we began the next phase to honor Daddy's wish to be at home till the very end.

Hospice was the next gift. Volunteering, knowing hospice here, and visiting so many in hospice care you get a sense of what is happening, but sitting in that room with my sister and my father's wife and hearing what they can do and will do...it is nothing short of phenomenal. But the most important thing came out of this: Daddy could go home. That was the bottom line. The CNA's, the RN who would oversee, the details and the 24 hour call in case of need, and being able to keep him out of pain. It was just so powerful. We, however, would need to be there..and that was something that we just did not know about and it was frightening, but we were committed to.

I sat that whole weekend with Daddy in the hospital as we waited for Monday to come and him to go home. We watched Church together on Sunday morning, the races on Sunday afternoon, meet the press and MSNBC news programs. But we talked when he was able and he told me of what he wanted...all of it was for us to take care of each other.

Daddy got home and I went back to Wilmington. We thought the plan would be that Leanne and Buddy and Brenda would take the week and I would come up on the weekends, but the next day I was called from office. Daddy said to come. They all said to come. It was going downhill fast. Something inside me knew that this would be the last time I would make this trip to see Daddy. I stopped by the house and got somethings before I hit the road this time and, like in all my trips, I stared deeply into the clouds that decorate the sky each and every time I travel I-40. No radio on, just the clouds and the countryside.

I arrived at the house and went in the room. Daddy said "it's tough".. and I knew. He told me to stay with him. That he was proud of me, that he loved me. I was able to do the same. I was able to thank him for being my daddy. and then one after the other, people came in. Not one person came in where Daddy was not telling them how to take care, how he felt, some were getting specific instructions, some were getting some hopes...but all were getting love and all were told that he, my daddy, was going to be ok. It was amazing to witness and to be there with him.

We were shown how to administer the morphine and the medicine for his anxiety. Every two hours. Jenny Johnson, the RN from Hospice of wake county was another beautiful soul as was Tonya, the CNA. They walked us through and helped us know what the signs were, what his needs were, but most imporantly, they reassured us that we were doing the right things.

We decided I would take the night shift and leanne would come in the morning. We just did not know how long it would be. Daddy was ready. He has said so. He was at Peace. But his body was not willing just yet to let him go. So, at night, I pulled the recliner next the hospital bed that was in his room and stretched out and lay beside him. I could hear his breathing and for two nights, he would try and get up and every once and a while, so I took to holding his hand so that if he moved, it would wake me. Every two hours, my little alarm on the phone went off and I gave him his medicine and whenever he would try and get up, I would just be there to help him lie back down and be at rest. What was so amazing about holding his hand was that he had the hands of his mother. I can still feel her hands and when I grabbed his, they were so similar. I told him this and he liked it very much. He loved the idea of seeing her again and of seeing his Daddy too. Much comfort came from this and we talked about memories and things that gave us both joy. After he was not longer congent, he would raise his hand. I knew immediately what he was doing because I had seen that ever motion over and over when I was little. Daddy was motioning his bid on the market. He was buying. I thought as I watched him that he must be marching through his life, being able to see it before he left. But he would raise that hand and I would gently take it and lay it down and say "you got it daddy" and he would drift off.

Leanne did the same vigil all day during the day. All of it seemed like forever...the breathing, the medicine, the crying, the praying, the love that surrounded that room. Jenny told us that he was at peace...and she knew that becuase he had gotten all of his business done the days before. Now it was just time. She was a wise and beautiful soul. and so it went.

And then, as I was preparing for another day, and as I sat there in the room with Buddy and looked up and the short, shallow breath was still happening. I began to type again and I heard Buddy say "it stopped". I looked up at Daddy and his chest was not moving. It was completely quiet. He had left. Just that quietly. His long, hard journey had ended.

I got up and went over, stroked his hair, and buddy went to go inform the nurses. Daddy made me promise a few things about the way he would be after he left and I went to getting it done. I placed his Bible that I had left by his side the whole time in his hands, combed his hair, and placed a wooden cross I had placed around his neck when he was in the hospital for his heart a long time ago between his fingers, fixed his covers, took out all the medicinces and mess that looked like a hospital room that covered the fact that this was his bedroom, fufilled his requests in addition and then people came in.
It was exactly 2:00 when it happened.

For me I stayed as busy as I could. It just seemed surreal. The funeral home came and Buddy and I carried my daddy out of his house. Again, it seemed only right.

I choose his grey suit, a starched white shirt with his initials, his red striped tie, belt, shorts and socks...everyone liked what i choose. This was my daddy. Leanne got his barber to come.

the last two acts for me for him during all this was to close his casket at the end of the visitation. Again, I did this with Buddy. It was then that I lost it...it was so real. But, It did not last long enough. I wanted to cry for days, and yet it stipped in minutes. For another time.

Then, at his funeral, I got to read scripture..the good news for my daddy..for my family...I also got to say what a good man he was and how proud I am of my sister and of my brother in law. This was gift.

So much happened in such a short time and while I have left a lot out, I needed to get some of this out..somehow it makes it more real. and while there are "details" that linger...that was so much of what happened. I never in my life dreamed I would be here, for a lot of reasons. But no matter what, what was and is so powerful is that my Daddy had a good death. All the pain, all the issues, all the suffering...he was able to end in peace and love and surrounded by so much good and leave it in goodness.

For me, there was a lot of intensity in all this. I just have to continue a day at a time feeling what I am feeling and balancing the gratitude for having experienced all this with the pain that also was involved in this as well.

But, there is a list as long as I can write and it will be attended to of thanks....from the hotels that put me up with special rates for hospital visits, to the nurses on the floors, the hopsices, the people who facebooked, sent texts, sent flowers, did the flowers, came to the visitation, made calls, attended to my family......so many....and I assure you that these blessings will never go without thanks....

thanks be to God.
Know these folks...I am forever grateful to them:
Hospice of Wake County
Rex Hospital 
Rex Cancer Center
Ramada Inn on Blue Ridge Road
Whole Foods at Quail Ridge Shopping Center
McLeod's Florists in Angier, North Carolina
New Hope Presbyterian Church
Williford's Funderal Home
Comfort Inn Fuquay Varina
Cary Cardiologist 

Lenwood Sherill Dean Sr., passed peacefully into the presence of his Lord and Savior Jesus Christ on July 19, 2012 at home surrounded by his family. A native of willow Spring, and the son of the late Paul and Ada Dean, Sherill was a retired tobacco buyer with R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company. Sherill treasured his family, his friends and his church. Left to cherish sweet memories of Sherill are his wife, Brenda W. Dean, children Leanne Dean Walters and husband Buddy of Fuquay Varina, son L.S. “Bo” Dean Jr. and partner Michael Freeze of Wilmington, stepdaughter Dawn Mayo of Sanford. Grandchildren Lauren Walters Butts and husband Stephen, Morgan Adaire Walters, great grandchildren Mason, Garrett and Wesley Butts. Step-grandchildren Chris Adams, Wesley and Jeremy Walten and Haley Frame. Brothers and sisters in law Marshel and Joy Dean, the late Bobby G. Dean and Peggy all of Willow Spring. Nephew Tim Dean and wife Kelly of Ocean Isle.
The family wishes to thank Dr. China Goli, Dr. JoEllen Specca and their office staff, as well as special friends Phillip Carroll, Sammy and Jennifer Warren for their assistance and love for our father. Any remembrances in Sherill’s honor may be sent to Hospice of Wake County.
The family will receive friends from 6:00-8:00 pm, Saturday July 21, 2012 at Williford Funeral Home with services at New Hope Presbyterian Church, Hwy 42 Willow Spring, on Sunday, July 22,2012 at 1:00 pm



Cary Cardiologist

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Day 918: Greater than through love and support!

we are sitting here, around my dad. I am about to take the night shift. He is at his journey's end. I am not sure exactly how to describe it, but I know I am fortunate...blessed..to be able to be here. To be able to have said all that needed to be said. To be sitting here and available for him. But I was not thinking about that..or this moment.this experience as much as I was thinking about my dad.

Am I greater than because of him?

See..like most father's and sons, it is complicated and we have this wonderful tradition in the south that when the final bell is tolled for our departed all of a sudden its "bless his heart" and "what a powerful man" and on and on. The other stuff, well...not so much. But, what relationship does not have pain, mistakes, major issues? Not one that I can think of...not one that does not have a whole lot of love and a long history...a lot of trying and being there for each other....a lot of pride in each other. A lot...and I mean a lot of forgiveness....on everyone's part. and even more accepting each other for who and what we are or what we become.

And so hear we are...my daddy and me....and it is his time to transition and I am full of love. period. He told me he loved me. he told me he was proud of me. and I got to tell him the same. We laughed a little..and we told stories. OH MY..if you think I am a story teller, you ain't heard nothing like my daddy tell a story.

and then....there is that question...am I greater than through the love and support of this man....
well...

there were the summer's...just daddy and me in the warehouses on the tobacco market. i saw the pride in my daddy's face when he introduced me to the other buyers and folks...he loved me and gave me such an  amazing summer.  He let me loose in the warehouses on the golf carts and then let me follow the sale as the auctioneers went on and Daddy got the best of the best and the auctioneer proclaimed that bale REYNOLDS!...He took me took me to South of the Border from chadburn as my "treat" and for years I thought that was the mexican border (don't judge me...Pedro said it!) and he let me buy firecrackers that are stories in and of themselves. Each year down there, like clockwork, I would have an asthma attack and end up in some columbus county hospital and he sat there through the night with me just like I am sitting here now. The next day getting a coke and a nab and back at it.

there were those tomato sandwiches with duke's mayonaise, white bread and salt and pepper.

there was showing me that a jar of water in the refrigerator is as good as any fine champagne...and in the summer tastes much sweeter

there were those go carts that made him say "damnit" like it was the only word in his vocabulary..but when we got them going and went on the track around the field and spent all day at it..he was the happiest in the world we were having a good time.

there was seeing me play in Mr. Petty's car..yep...Richard. He carried that car around for him and it was parked in our back yard...I loved climbing into that car and playing behind the wheel..and seeing daddy's face as I did.

there were those Christmas's..Lord those Christmas's. Everyone trying so hard..ours was the first divorce in the family and everyone tried to make it "Normal". we would be picked up and daddy would have all the presents Santa left at his house, all place in piles, specific to us....so much...so carefully gotten.

there were those trips to myrtle beach each year staying with the owners of the Royal Villa off the main stip. Daddy in the waves with me, riding them as good as I did and when I big one came, proclaming "here comes the judge"....then helping me build castles..even though he would much rather be at the pool at the hotel. And God. those thousands of hours this poor man had to spend playing and perfecting ski ball with me or going through the Gay Dolphin to get "just the right gifts" for people when I got home. and the seafood...driving to calabash...thank God for that gift!..yep..definitley greater for knowing Hushpuppies and fried shrimp.

there were those saturday's when he had me polish shoes. Shoes were to be polished. Always. and they were to be done right. we did that together and I still do it right.

There were those starched shirts...shirts are to be starched...and monograms are a good thing even if your initials are LSD.

there were those trips to Max Sox barber sharp everytime I was with him. Necks are to be clean and shaved and nails are to be trim and clean and we did this together. I learned the art of banter at that place and did not even know it at the time.

There were those Sunday mornings....oh we were going to church. that is the way the world works. Not going to church means the world ends! :) and when that collection plates comes around, if you are old enough to sit in a pew, you are old enough to put money in that plate..and he always had a dollar for me to give. It was my first lesson in giving...interestingly, in the drawer next to where I sit, there is an envelope of nothing but 1$ bills. That means a lot to me and every child who knows my daddy.

There were those sunday mornings in church where you listened even if you wanted to sleep. :) and oh did we want to sleep! but that is where I learned some lessons on respect and being available even when i did not agree. and then we sang...and daddy's deep voice always three octaves below the melody...after church there was the shaking of hands and speaking and family. no rushing.

there were those sunday dinners at Grandma Dean's. Time with family. Being togehter. the adults at the big table, the children, sometimes with Uncle Marshel at the folding table, but everyone together. Daddy saw to this for us. He would say to love your "roots" to know this and to be proud of it.

there was setting up the tables for the dean reunion, just him and me. Making sure it was done right like Aunt Annie and making sure that the table clothes were straight and the poinsettas were perfect and there were enough for each of the women in the family to take home....and that there was mountain dew for the grandchildren, stephenson's bbq a plenty and the fire in the firepalce in the fellowship hall was perfect. 

There were those drives to panther lake, granville county and other places where daddy showed me where my great grandparents farmed, how they lived, and what was left of those places. Daddy walked me through his memories and gave me stories and shared with me some of who he was.

There were those visits to graves and setting out flowers. That was so very important to him that the flowers be changed regularly and that there was always something that showed love and care for those who had passed. He let me be a part of that with him.

there was showing up in Carrboro when I was so very sick and lost as a teenager. He, in his own way was there and showed up for me.

(It was at this moment, when I had finished typing this. I had looked up a minute before and Daddy was breathing, but when i put the period on this sentence, my brother in law said, "Bo I think he has stopped". It took me a moment, but i knew exactly what he meant. I looked up and daddy had stopped breathing. he had quietly left room. Sometime I will write more about this, but tomorrow is the funeral and I want very much to finish these memories. I may not be able to finish them all, but I want to do what i can while it is fresh in my mind....)

there was teaching me to know the name of who you do business with and look them in the eye when you do it. and if they do you wrong more then once...move on. but give everyone a chance.

there was teaching me to keep my eye on the ball when I took my swing with a golf club, even though he threatened to tie my head to something rather delicate to ensure that i did...at least i never forgot.

there was taking tim and me to the barn and teaching us how to shoot.

there was giving a wedding present to his son and son in law..that was a huge and one I will never forget..

there were the millions of hours talking democratic politics and his deep desire to see our world better and all he did to try and make it so. 

there telling me jokes and stories that will live in my mind and heart the rest of my life.

there was so much more that is absolutely impossible to capture in some blog post.,,,but at the end of the day...I know now that the imperfect perfection that is a parent is a blessing that I am grateful I understood before the end was just that.....a blessing. I am who I am because of my parents. I am part my daddy and I am VERY proud of that. I am very blessed by that and I am so very grateful that at the end, I could be there to say thank you to him.


Monday, July 09, 2012

Day 902: Greater than through love and support!

When I was checking out at West Marine I asked the guy, "does this come with divorce insurance?". he smiled and said, "you are not the first man to ask that!".

I loaded my new purchase into the car with him and headed home. A new adventure awaiting.
No divorce awaited me. Just the opposite. Happiness that I had gotten something that I could take my joy to the next the next level. Even more happiness that I had gotten a good deal. But, as usual, support and love for wanting to try to do something that would bring me peace, a challenge, something new. I had gone and gotten my sit on top kayak. I was supposed to leave our lunch and go to the grocery store and somehow West marine, being so near by Harris Teeter just lured me in....somehow. :)

I have so wanted to launch from the beach ever since I was at Kate and Mark's last summer with the Honors Student and tried it down at Kure Beach. I tired to do it with the little Kayak and it was a complete failure..sinking me each time. The call of those waves was intense and it was scary too! :) But I got a lot more than I could have ever imagined out of my first trip out.

First, I had not really done this before..Kure was a short trip and it was pretty calm...the waves at the time were small and I did not stay out long. This time I was on my own and the surf was way up. I was prepared in some ways; had my life jacket, a botttle of water, and a whistle. I had sense enough to look for the lifegaurd stands and monitor where I was.

I jumped up on the craft and paddled out. The surf wanted to push me back, but I pushed ahead. I thought it was best to get past the break point, and that was smart as I was able to get on and stay on. But this was not easy paddle and I hit the waves straight on..taking me up and then sending me down like riding a horse! It was thrilling. Paddling did not take me far and was intense! I don't think I have worked quite so hard, but the pay off was the waves...up and down, and the higher the wave, the greater the release on the other side..it was exhilarating!

I was obsessed for a little while on seeing dolphins or some sort of wildlife..so obsessed that I almost did not see a full grown pelican literally floating feet beside me. It occurred to me that I was spending so much time looking for something I was missing the beauty right under my nose...uh huh...yep, there was something to this...and I got in the moment. I started to see the vastness of the ocean over the horizon..the shape and dimension of the waves....the power of them...and yes, I got it that there is respect for that power...and I got it why surfers are so obsessed by being out there! It is the ultimate in peace...even while battling the current..even while running up and down..there is this tranquility..this energy..it is palapable....

and I did keep my eye on the shore. while i was experiencing all this wonder, I was able to keep my footing, my bearings so I did not get lost or swept away. yep...there is something to this....

I was whooping and hollering and having a 12 year old's good time and this youngin' about 15 feet away was on a surf board and I nodded at him like i knew what I was doing..just a little cocky..and I turned back to the horizon and a wave about the size of the sunspree hotel came up..took the kayak straight up, turned it, me and the world right us over top of my tail. I had sense enough to let the boat go and hold on to the paddle. The life jacket brought me right up and righted me, but I was in a panic for a second not sure how to get back to shore....the boat went to my right...and i was not sure what to do. I was holding on and just looking for what to do next...then it occurred to me to stretch out my legs..and when i did...yep....I touched the ground! :) Even that far out..I was not that deep and was just fine. no need to blow the whistle. Now the boat. I started towards it..and there was a guy swimming closer to it who went to it and grabbed it. He waited till I got there. I profusely thanked him as if he had saved it and me...and he just looked at me as if it was no big deal. It was just what you do. I was blown away by his kindness, but then I wasn't. By now, I should know that folks are there when I am in need. I am there when others are need. That is how it works. That is how it worked. yep, there is something in this.....

I was a little overwhelmed by getting knocked off and headed to shore..but it occurred to me that I was not ready to go home and getting knocked off was no reason to stop when i was having such an experience. So, I headed back out..I jumped back on...and I paddled harder than before..got bigger and badder waves...and I was able to have a conversation with higher powers. Just sit and talk and listen. It was amazing....

So...it was more than Kayaking....It was:
1.) remembering that I don't have to be afraid to pursue things I want to with those I love when it is something I really want for my own health and wellness.
2.) rememering to look at what it in front of me and seeing the beauty that is there and not getting so distracted by what might be or looking for something that I don't see what it.
3.) taking risks, but being mindful of the dangers and taking measures to ensure some safety
4.) remembering that I am never alone and all things come with love and support of others
5.) and I can have some fun..and really just kick the frick back!

Adam Freeman Personal Training  | Juice Plus Whole Food Nutrition!   |Cape Fear Heart Walk! GIVE TODAY! | Crest Fitness | Live Fit Cape Fear! |Custom Fit Meals| Heidi Kaufman Nutritional Services-Dietitian | Bike Cycles Bike Shop at Mayfaire| Boseman's Sporting Goods | New Balance Shoes | Tidal Creek- Healthy Foods! | Costco| Pita Delite- Wilmington | Hibachi Bistro on College Road | The Star News | WECT | Wilmington Biz and Wilma | Encore Magazine | New Hanover County Public Health Department | Zoe's Kitchen | Try Sports| VitaCost online NC Company for sports Nutrition | City of Wilmington Parks and Recreation| New Hanover County Parks| Airlie Gardens | The Shell Cross City Trail | Wrightsville Family Practice | Sandra Miles Dentistry | Church of the Servant Episcopal | Active.Com| Without Limits Coaching | Go Time| Cape Fear River Watch| New Hanover County Arboretum| Coastal Land Trust| Masonboro.org| Hook, Line and Paddle| Wilmington Road Runners | Cape Fear Cyclists| Jessica Cooper Therapeutic Services

Tuesday, July 03, 2012

Day 896: Greater than through love and support!

I think I have quoted this before but there was a wonderful, spirtual mentor in my life 20 some years ago who told passed on to me that "true humility is the achievement of one's own excellence".

At the time when he told me that (or told us that as it was a youth group that I was in) I had no clue whatsoever what he was talking about. First of all I only knew humiliation and exaggerated ego. I didn't know whole lot about what humility was and had no real estimation of my self. At the time I certainly didn't know what excellence meant and while I covered up my shortcomings with the defense of ego I didn't know what I was truly capable of and I didn't really understand what my talents were or what I was able to do in the fullest. As a result I was seeking things that were not in my "excellence" and I was seeking things I thought would make me happy or successful: mostly things or activities that I thought others admired or respected, but not necessarily things that fit me or were or what I wanted or valued or ever felt comfortable doing.

So finding my "excellence" was about living up to my own potential, but moreover, being authentic and true to who and what I am. The way to that though was getting rid of what I thought others wanted, what pleased others, what others found valuable and look at what I found valuable..what was at my core. What is that my higher power had in mind when he wound me up and made me....what was my purpose sans all the stuff that was layered on top and I had obstructed my way with. 

Bob started me on that discovery with that simple phrase "true humility is the achievement of one's own excellence". It was up to me to listen and be ready to experience what that was and is. By being opened to it I began to develop some understanding of what it was that I was capable of  and by truly acknowledging the gifts that I had by realizing the scope in the depths of all that I had that was offered to me that I can achieve so many wonderful and great things but that I had to take time to find out what was in my scope.

The humility part of it was being right sized; realizing that there are some things that I am NOT capable of, and I am one of many, one with many...there came a sense of self that is in perspective (ok..most of the time!) that is not so grandiose, not so out of whack with the rest of the world, that I am part of a community, that I'm part of the world around me and by being right size by being a part of things and there's just so many wonderful things that can go on and that will go as a result.

Why am I am on about this...again? LOL! Well..this is not some sudden revelation..this excellence is discovery..and I have been seeing and experiencing some things lately that have lead me to a place where once again I am hearing that statement in my head; where gifts are abundant all around me, where lessons continue to come into my life and they are continuing to help me to see what is my direction and purpose..what is His direction.

What is it that really is at the core of who I am. Most of you know by now that any kind of issue or any kind of movement that really moves me with regards to anything to do with basic human needs whether it's homelessness or whether it's child abuse or whether it's substance abuse and mental health anything that's about basic human needs drives me more than anything else in my life.

Well within my excellence I know that I can rally and I can be about doing things that are supportive and that are about championing those causes. Health and wellness is something that I have found in my own self and it's something that I can champion.

I guess I'm just coming to the point where I realized that's okay and that's something that I really can center my life around and I can really focus on and really embrace and I can find my excellence in all of that. The latest part of my journey where this weight loss in this new health and all of this it's really brought me to understand the importance of using the lessons that are in front of me to focus in on how I can be a part of the solution where you're part of things that make a difference and make those changes. But it all has to start with me and I have to do the things that are necessary to take care of myself.  I have to make sure that I'm eating right,  have to make sure that I am exercising,  that I'm focusing on myself spiritually,  and that I'm doing those things primarily in my relationship and my relationships that are healthy and they're wise and that I'm doing the things that are necessary to take those lessons and move them in the right direction and see them all as the opportunities that they are.

 I say that because a few weeks ago I was kind of not sure what was going on in terms of the things that were right in front of me and old habits are easy to get into but I think that one thing that word humility where if I'm keeping right size and keeping within those parameters and I'm really focused in on what is my excellence that makes it all really truly possible for me to see everything that's in front of me as an opportunity and I am grateful today for all the opportunities that I have.


Adam Freeman Personal Training  | Juice Plus Whole Food Nutrition!   |Cape Fear Heart Walk! GIVE TODAY! | Crest Fitness | Live Fit Cape Fear! |Custom Fit Meals| Heidi Kaufman Nutritional Services-Dietitian | Bike Cycles Bike Shop at Mayfaire| Boseman's Sporting Goods | New Balance Shoes | Tidal Creek- Healthy Foods! | Costco| Pita Delite- Wilmington | Hibachi Bistro on College Road | The Star News | WECT | Wilmington Biz and Wilma | Encore Magazine | New Hanover County Public Health Department | Zoe's Kitchen | Try Sports| VitaCost online NC Company for sports Nutrition | City of Wilmington Parks and Recreation| New Hanover County Parks| Airlie Gardens | The Shell Cross City Trail | Wrightsville Family Practice | Sandra Miles Dentistry | Church of the Servant Episcopal | Active.Com| Without Limits Coaching | Go Time| Cape Fear River Watch| New Hanover County Arboretum| Coastal Land Trust| Masonboro.org| Hook, Line and Paddle| Wilmington Road Runners | Cape Fear Cyclists| Jessica Cooper Therapeutic Services