Monday, July 09, 2012

Day 902: Greater than through love and support!

When I was checking out at West Marine I asked the guy, "does this come with divorce insurance?". he smiled and said, "you are not the first man to ask that!".

I loaded my new purchase into the car with him and headed home. A new adventure awaiting.
No divorce awaited me. Just the opposite. Happiness that I had gotten something that I could take my joy to the next the next level. Even more happiness that I had gotten a good deal. But, as usual, support and love for wanting to try to do something that would bring me peace, a challenge, something new. I had gone and gotten my sit on top kayak. I was supposed to leave our lunch and go to the grocery store and somehow West marine, being so near by Harris Teeter just lured me in....somehow. :)

I have so wanted to launch from the beach ever since I was at Kate and Mark's last summer with the Honors Student and tried it down at Kure Beach. I tired to do it with the little Kayak and it was a complete failure..sinking me each time. The call of those waves was intense and it was scary too! :) But I got a lot more than I could have ever imagined out of my first trip out.

First, I had not really done this before..Kure was a short trip and it was pretty calm...the waves at the time were small and I did not stay out long. This time I was on my own and the surf was way up. I was prepared in some ways; had my life jacket, a botttle of water, and a whistle. I had sense enough to look for the lifegaurd stands and monitor where I was.

I jumped up on the craft and paddled out. The surf wanted to push me back, but I pushed ahead. I thought it was best to get past the break point, and that was smart as I was able to get on and stay on. But this was not easy paddle and I hit the waves straight on..taking me up and then sending me down like riding a horse! It was thrilling. Paddling did not take me far and was intense! I don't think I have worked quite so hard, but the pay off was the waves...up and down, and the higher the wave, the greater the release on the other was exhilarating!

I was obsessed for a little while on seeing dolphins or some sort of obsessed that I almost did not see a full grown pelican literally floating feet beside me. It occurred to me that I was spending so much time looking for something I was missing the beauty right under my nose...uh huh...yep, there was something to this...and I got in the moment. I started to see the vastness of the ocean over the horizon..the shape and dimension of the waves....the power of them...and yes, I got it that there is respect for that power...and I got it why surfers are so obsessed by being out there! It is the ultimate in peace...even while battling the current..even while running up and down..there is this tranquility..this is palapable....

and I did keep my eye on the shore. while i was experiencing all this wonder, I was able to keep my footing, my bearings so I did not get lost or swept away. yep...there is something to this....

I was whooping and hollering and having a 12 year old's good time and this youngin' about 15 feet away was on a surf board and I nodded at him like i knew what I was doing..just a little cocky..and I turned back to the horizon and a wave about the size of the sunspree hotel came up..took the kayak straight up, turned it, me and the world right us over top of my tail. I had sense enough to let the boat go and hold on to the paddle. The life jacket brought me right up and righted me, but I was in a panic for a second not sure how to get back to shore....the boat went to my right...and i was not sure what to do. I was holding on and just looking for what to do next...then it occurred to me to stretch out my legs..and when i did...yep....I touched the ground! :) Even that far out..I was not that deep and was just fine. no need to blow the whistle. Now the boat. I started towards it..and there was a guy swimming closer to it who went to it and grabbed it. He waited till I got there. I profusely thanked him as if he had saved it and me...and he just looked at me as if it was no big deal. It was just what you do. I was blown away by his kindness, but then I wasn't. By now, I should know that folks are there when I am in need. I am there when others are need. That is how it works. That is how it worked. yep, there is something in this.....

I was a little overwhelmed by getting knocked off and headed to shore..but it occurred to me that I was not ready to go home and getting knocked off was no reason to stop when i was having such an experience. So, I headed back out..I jumped back on...and I paddled harder than bigger and badder waves...and I was able to have a conversation with higher powers. Just sit and talk and listen. It was amazing.... was more than Kayaking....It was:
1.) remembering that I don't have to be afraid to pursue things I want to with those I love when it is something I really want for my own health and wellness.
2.) rememering to look at what it in front of me and seeing the beauty that is there and not getting so distracted by what might be or looking for something that I don't see what it.
3.) taking risks, but being mindful of the dangers and taking measures to ensure some safety
4.) remembering that I am never alone and all things come with love and support of others
5.) and I can have some fun..and really just kick the frick back!

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